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Jami at-Tirmidhi 2413 (Book 36, Hadith 111) #28048
Taking Care of Oneself and Others

SUMMARY: The hadith is about the importance of taking care of oneself, one's family, and one's guests.

Ubu Juhaifah narrated from his father who said: "The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w) made a bond of brotherhood between Salman and Abu Ad-Darda. Salman went to visit Abu Ad-Darda, and saw Umm Ad-Darda wearing shabby clothes, So he said: 'Why are you wearing such shabby clothes?' She said: 'Your brother Abu Ad-Darda has no interest in the world'. So when Abu Ad-Darda arrived, he prepared some food for him (Salman) and said: 'Eat, for I am fasting'. He said: 'I shall not eat until you eat'." He said: "So he ate. When night came Abu Ad-Darda started to leave and stand (in prayer), but Salman said to him: 'Sleep'. So he slept. Then he went to stand (in prayer) but he said to him: 'Sleep'. So he slept. When the morning (Fajr) came,Salman said: 'Get up now'.So he got up to perform Salat. Then he (Salman) said: 'Indeed your self has a right upon you, your Lord has a right upon you, your guest has a right upon you, and your family has a right upon you. So give each the right they are due. The Prophet (s.a.w), and that was mentioned to him, so he said: 'Salman has told the truth'."
حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ بَشَّارٍ، حَدَّثَنَا جَعْفَرُ بْنُ عَوْنٍ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو الْعُمَيْسِ، عَنْ عَوْنِ بْنِ أَبِي جُحَيْفَةَ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، قَالَ آخَى رَسُولُ اللَّهِ بَيْنَ سَلْمَانَ وَبَيْنَ أَبِي الدَّرْدَاءِ فَزَارَ سَلْمَانُ أَبَا الدَّرْدَاءِ فَرَأَى أُمَّ الدَّرْدَاءِ مُتَبَذِّلَةً فَقَالَ مَا شَأْنُكِ مُتَبَذِّلَةً قَالَتْ إِنَّ أَخَاكَ أَبَا الدَّرْدَاءِ لَيْسَ لَهُ حَاجَةٌ فِي الدُّنْيَا ‏.‏ قَالَ فَلَمَّا جَاءَ أَبُو الدَّرْدَاءِ قَرَّبَ إِلَيْهِ طَعَامًا فَقَالَ كُلْ فَإِنِّي صَائِمٌ ‏.‏ قَالَ مَا أَنَا بِآكِلٍ حَتَّى تَأْكُلَ ‏.‏ قَالَ فَأَكَلَ فَلَمَّا كَانَ اللَّيْلُ ذَهَبَ أَبُو الدَّرْدَاءِ لِيَقُومَ فَقَالَ لَهُ سَلْمَانُ نَمْ ‏.‏ فَنَامَ ثُمَّ ذَهَبَ يَقُومُ فَقَالَ لَهُ نَمْ ‏.‏ فَنَامَ فَلَمَّا كَانَ عِنْدَ الصُّبْحِ قَالَ لَهُ سَلْمَانُ قُمِ الآنَ فَقَامَا فَصَلَّيَا فَقَالَ إِنَّ لِنَفْسِكَ عَلَيْكَ حَقًّا وَلِرَبِّكَ عَلَيْكَ حَقًّا وَلِضَيْفِكَ عَلَيْكَ حَقًّا وَإِنَّ لأَهْلِكَ عَلَيْكَ حَقًّا فَأَعْطِ كُلَّ ذِي حَقٍّ حَقَّهُ ‏.‏ فَأَتَيَا النَّبِيَّ فَذَكَرَا ذَلِكَ فَقَالَ لَهُ ‏ "‏ صَدَقَ سَلْمَانُ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ صَحِيحٌ ‏.‏ وَأَبُو الْعُمَيْسِ اسْمُهُ عُتْبَةُ بْنُ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ وَهُوَ أَخُو عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ الْمَسْعُودِيِّ

TOPICS
family  *  guests  *  rights  *  selfcare

QUICK LESSONS:
Take responsibility for yourself ; Take responsibility for others ; Prioritize needs over wants ; Be kind ; Show respect ; Show compassion ; Show hospitality

EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith emphasizes the importance of taking care of oneself, one's family, and one's guests. It is narrated that Salman visited Abu Ad-Darda and saw Umm Ad-Darda wearing shabby clothes. When he asked her why she was wearing such shabby clothes, she said it was because Abu Ad-Darda had no interest in worldly matters. When Abu Ad-Darda arrived home he prepared food for Salman but refused to eat until Salman ate first. Later on when night came Abu Ad-Darda started to leave to stand in prayer but Salman told him to sleep instead so that he could rest himself as well as take care of his guest. In the morning when it was time for Fajr prayer again Salman told him to get up so that he could perform Salat before attending to his guest’s needs again. This incident prompted the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) to say “Indeed your self has a right upon you, your Lord has a right upon you, your guest has a right upon you, and your family has a right upon you” meaning that we should not neglect our own needs or those of our families or guests while fulfilling our obligations towards Allah Almighty at the same time.

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