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Jami at-Tirmidhi 1087 (Book 11, Hadith 8) #26654
Looking Before Proposing

SUMMARY: The Prophet advised Al-Mughirah bin Shu'bah to look at the woman he proposed to, as it would help them get along better.

Bakr bin Abdullah Al-Muzani narrated that : Al-Mughirah bin Shu'bah proposed to a woman, so the Prophet said: "Look at her, for indeed that is more likely to make things better between the two of you".
حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ مَنِيعٍ، حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ أَبِي زَائِدَةَ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي عَاصِمُ بْنُ سُلَيْمَانَ، هُوَ الأَحْوَلُ عَنْ بَكْرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ الْمُزَنِيِّ، عَنِ الْمُغِيرَةِ بْنِ شُعْبَةَ، أَنَّهُ خَطَبَ امْرَأَةً فَقَالَ النَّبِيُّ ‏"‏ انْظُرْ إِلَيْهَا فَإِنَّهُ أَحْرَى أَنْ يُؤْدَمَ بَيْنَكُمَا ‏"‏ ‏.‏ وَفِي الْبَابِ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ مَسْلَمَةَ وَجَابِرٍ وَأَنَسٍ وَأَبِي حُمَيْدٍ وَأَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ ‏.‏ قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ ‏.‏ وَقَدْ ذَهَبَ بَعْضُ أَهْلِ الْعِلْمِ إِلَى هَذَا الْحَدِيثِ وَقَالُوا لاَ بَأْسَ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ إِلَيْهَا مَا لَمْ يَرَ مِنْهَا مُحَرَّمًا ‏.‏ وَهُوَ قَوْلُ أَحْمَدَ وَإِسْحَاقَ ‏.‏ وَمَعْنَى قَوْلِهِ ‏"‏ أَحْرَى أَنْ يُؤْدَمَ بَيْنَكُمَا ‏"‏ قَالَ أَحْرَى أَنْ تَدُومَ الْمَوَدَّةُ بَيْنَكُمَا

TOPICS
proposal  *  marriage  *  looking  *  istikhaarah  *  zawaj  *  nazar

QUICK LESSONS:
Take your time and think carefully before making any important decisions in life; Be mindful of how your actions can affect others; Strive for harmony in relationships with others; Take advice from those who know you best.

EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith is about the importance of looking before proposing marriage. The Prophet advised Al-Mughirah bin Shu'bah to look at the woman he proposed to, as it would make things better between them. This hadith teaches us that we should take our time and think carefully before making any important decisions in life, especially when it comes to marriage. We should not rush into anything without considering all aspects of a situation and taking advice from those who know us best. It also shows us that we should be mindful of how our actions can affect others and strive for harmony in our relationships with others.

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