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Sahih al-Bukhari 1304 (Book 23, Hadith 62) #1254
Grief and Punishment in Islam

SUMMARY: The Prophet (ﷺ) taught that Allah does not punish for shedding tears or grief of the heart, but He punishes or bestows His Mercy because of what is said.

Narrated 'Abdullah bin 'Umar: Sa'd bin 'Ubada became sick and the Prophet ﷺ along with 'Abdur Rahman bin 'Auf, Sa'd bin Abi Waqqas and 'Abdullah bin Mas'ud visited him to inquire about his health. When he came to him, he found him surrounded by his household and he asked, "Has he died?" They said, "No, O Allah's Apostle". The Prophet ﷺ wept and when the people saw the weeping of Allah's Messenger ﷺ (pbuh) they all wept. He said, "Will you listen? Allah does not punish for shedding tears, nor for the grief of the heart but he punishes or bestows His Mercy because of this". He pointed to his tongue and added, "The deceased is punished for the wailing of his relatives over him"'.Umar used to beat with a stick and throw stones and put dust over the faces (of those who used to wail over the dead).
حَدَّثَنَا أَصْبَغُ، عَنِ ابْنِ وَهْبٍ، قَالَ أَخْبَرَنِي عَمْرٌو، عَنْ سَعِيدِ بْنِ الْحَارِثِ الأَنْصَارِيِّ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عُمَرَ ـ رضى الله عنهما ـ قَالَ اشْتَكَى سَعْدُ بْنُ عُبَادَةَ شَكْوَى لَهُ فَأَتَاهُ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ يَعُودُهُ مَعَ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ عَوْفٍ وَسَعْدِ بْنِ أَبِي وَقَّاصٍ وَعَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ مَسْعُودٍ ـ رضى الله عنهم ـ فَلَمَّا دَخَلَ عَلَيْهِ فَوَجَدَهُ فِي غَاشِيَةِ أَهْلِهِ فَقَالَ ‏"‏ قَدْ قَضَى ‏"‏‏.‏ قَالُوا لاَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ‏.‏ فَبَكَى النَّبِيُّ ﷺ فَلَمَّا رَأَى الْقَوْمُ بُكَاءَ النَّبِيِّ ﷺ بَكَوْا فَقَالَ ‏"‏ أَلاَ تَسْمَعُونَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ لاَ يُعَذِّبُ بِدَمْعِ الْعَيْنِ، وَلاَ بِحُزْنِ الْقَلْبِ، وَلَكِنْ يُعَذِّبُ بِهَذَا ـ وَأَشَارَ إِلَى لِسَانِهِ ـ أَوْ يَرْحَمُ وَإِنَّ الْمَيِّتَ يُعَذَّبُ بِبُكَاءِ أَهْلِهِ عَلَيْهِ ‏"‏‏.‏ وَكَانَ عُمَرُ ـ رضى الله عنه ـ يَضْرِبُ فِيهِ بِالْعَصَا، وَيَرْمِي بِالْحِجَارَةِ وَيَحْثِي بِالتُّرَابِ‏.‏
TOPICS
grief  *  punishment  *  mercy  *  wailing

QUICK LESSONS:
Respectfully grieve those who have passed away; be mindful towards your words & actions; control your emotions & reactions

EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith teaches us about the importance of controlling our emotions when someone passes away. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ was visiting a sick man and asked if he had died yet. When he found out that he hadn't, the Prophet ﷺ wept and so did everyone else in the room. He then taught them that Allah does not punish people for their tears or grief, but rather for what they say during this time. Umar used to beat people with sticks and throw stones at them if they were wailing too much over a deceased person's death. This shows us how important it is to control our emotions during times of sadness, as we should be mindful of what we say in order to avoid punishment from Allah SWT. We should also remember that it is okay to feel sad when someone passes away; however, we must remain mindful of our words and actions so as not to incur any punishment from Allah SWT.

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