A serious question that I truly need help with.

Salam,

I think you did the right thing. Once Allah has guided you and you have asked His forgiveness and guidance, and you sincerely live up to the promise of obeying Allah it is your duty to not to talk about whatever bad you did in the past, if you want Allah to forgive you. So, even though he should not insist on knowing your past. Ask him if he is interested in your past of your future, only if he is being too investigative, I hope he is not. Pray to Allah often to bring peace, love and understanding between two of you. If he is also a practicing and good hearted Muslim he will understand and look forward, not backwards, Inshallah.

May Allah make your path easy, Ameen.

Hasan

sayyeda786 wrote: Salam everyone who reads this, I was born a Muslim and have not practiced as much as I should have until recently. I always knew there was no God but Allah and Muhammad (PBUH) is his messenger. However, I did things in the past which I should not have - the specifics are unnecessary. However, I have been continuously praying and praying to Allah and have truly been asking for forgiveness. I am a much better muslim now, alhumdulilah, and abide by Islamic decorum. I have recently met a man whom I am suppose to wed. We were discussing our pasts and he asked me if I have even been with a man before, in any sense. The answer is yes, but I told him no because I do not want him to know of my past, but see me as pure (which I am in that sense). The only reason I told him no is because I truly asked for forgiveness and believe that Allah has forgiven me for all that I have done in my past. I don't think it is necessary for my soon to be husband to know any of this, but do you think it's wrong that I'm not telling him? I really don't want him to know and changed my ways completely solely for him. I know Allah has forgiven me, and I will continue praying that he does forgive me even further. I just need some advice as to what is the right thing to do. Jazak'Allah for anyone who can provide any insight. I truly appreciate it.

Walaikum salaam wa rahmatullah

Sister, you were right by answering him with a NO. It was your past, also are we not allowed to expose our sins

Read this saying of our beloved Prophet { sallal lahu alayhi wasallam }


Abu Hurayrah reported: �The Messenger of Allaah said: �Every member of my nation will be forgiven, except those who expose their wrongdoings. An example of this is that of a man who commits a sin at night which Allaah then conceals, but, the next morning, he goes and says (to people): �I committed such and such a sin last night� - while Allaah had kept it secret. During the night Allaah had concealed it, but in the morning he tore up the cover provided by Allaah Himself.� [Al-Bukhaari & Muslim]

All Praises be to Allah, The Merciful, that the beauty of Islam is everytime we sincerly repent, we do get remembered of the sins we committed despite repentance. And every time repent for that sin, we are not only forgiven, but also rewarded as that sin is turned into a good deed. SubhanAllah. So sister, you may remember your sin tomorrow and may feel that you were wrong by hiding it with your husband, then don't pay an ear to those whisperings.

Wishing you a happy married life :)




Edited by seekshidayath - 03 July 2011 at 6:31am

Yeah, I also see no good reason to reveal what Allah has concealed, and which you have sought repentance.  What I find extremely important is that once you are married, that you never, ever, mention this.  There was a recent study that said: 

Your brain also doesn't like stress hormones. So when you have a secret to tell, the part of your brain that wants to tell the secret is constantly fighting with the part of your brain that wants to keep the information hidden...."

http://www.npr.org/2011/05/31/136495499/incognito-whats-hiding-in-the-unconscious-mind

Salam,