mom sharing a bed with her kids

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USA-NIQAABI View Drop Down

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Posted: 30 January 2007 at 6:25am

Assalamu'Alaikum,

I forgot but in my last post I used the term "you" meaning in general to all muslimahs...I didn't want you to think I misread your posting as it was relating to your friends situation....Insha'Allah

USA-NIQAABI View Drop Down

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Posted: 30 January 2007 at 6:21am

Assalamu'Alaikum,

Insha'Allah I think the extended family thing would depend. Are you talking about a young child or sister-in-law etc...If it was a female member like your mother-in-law and you were sharing a bed with females or young children out of necessity if you were travelling or whatever the situation was I think that would be fine.....but the husband and other older male members should have their own seperate area to sleep.

About your own children...when my boys were very small and I was still nursing them I had a little moses basket/bassinet that I kept in the middle of the bed between my husband and myself so if they fell asleep and it was one of the late...late night feedings I'd just put them to sleep in their little bassinet on the bed....also it was large enough so I didnt' worry about the rolling issue during sleep....

I have older boys and when we travel we often end up sharing a large bed...I have no issues with it but I would also not dress in less than pajamas with top and pant bottoms or house jilbab with full pant bottoms....

I think that if it's a temporary issue due to travels or maybe the child is ill and you want to watch them thru the night it's fine. But once they are weened they should sleep in their own bed or you and your husband need to find another area to have intimate realations to avoid the children from waking and viewing this type of activity. Or if you are living in a one room flat to hang a curtain across part of the room so that the children would not see.

Edited by USA-NIQAABI

rookaiya

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Posted: 30 January 2007 at 3:05am

asalamu aliakum

i would like to hear objective views on the above topic. i know a sister who is married for the second time. she has a seventeen year old son. each time the sister has a fallout withe her hubby, she moves out of the bed, and sleeps on the floor in the other bedroom. and when this happens, her seventeen year old son sleeps with her in the same bed.

her husband is very upset about this. apprarently this is a common practice in this area. in fact some married couples even share a bed with members of their extended familes. they see nothing wrong with this, according to them its an old practice and they are not acting in an unacceptable way

secondly, some single moms, may opt to share a bed with their young children. e.g u have a single mom sharing a bed with her 3 year old son. at what age should this practice stop. when does this behaviour become inappropriate?

then theres the issue of nudity? being a single mother of boys, at times it hard to know when to draw the line. often at night its so hot and u dont wanna wear too many items of clothing. yet at the same time, u dont wanna expose your children (especially males) to your nudity?

is there any ruling on these issues? what is the islamic position here?

Author	Message Topic Search Topic Options Post Reply Create New Topic Printable Version Translate Topic
USA-NIQAABI Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Joined: 09 January 2007 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 167	Post Options Post Reply Quote USA-NIQAABI Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 30 January 2007 at 6:25am
	Assalamu'Alaikum, I forgot but in my last post I used the term "you" meaning in general to all muslimahs...I didn't want you to think I misread your posting as it was relating to your friends situation....Insha'Allah

USA-NIQAABI Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Joined: 09 January 2007 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 167	Post Options Post Reply Quote USA-NIQAABI Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 30 January 2007 at 6:21am
	Assalamu'Alaikum, Insha'Allah I think the extended family thing would depend. Are you talking about a young child or sister-in-law etc...If it was a female member like your mother-in-law and you were sharing a bed with females or young children out of necessity if you were travelling or whatever the situation was I think that would be fine.....but the husband and other older male members should have their own seperate area to sleep. About your own children...when my boys were very small and I was still nursing them I had a little moses basket/bassinet that I kept in the middle of the bed between my husband and myself so if they fell asleep and it was one of the late...late night feedings I'd just put them to sleep in their little bassinet on the bed....also it was large enough so I didnt' worry about the rolling issue during sleep.... I have older boys and when we travel we often end up sharing a large bed...I have no issues with it but I would also not dress in less than pajamas with top and pant bottoms or house jilbab with full pant bottoms.... I think that if it's a temporary issue due to travels or maybe the child is ill and you want to watch them thru the night it's fine. But once they are weened they should sleep in their own bed or you and your husband need to find another area to have intimate realations to avoid the children from waking and viewing this type of activity. Or if you are living in a one room flat to hang a curtain across part of the room so that the children would not see. Edited by USA-NIQAABI

rookaiya Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Joined: 04 May 2005 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 385	Post Options Post Reply Quote rookaiya Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 30 January 2007 at 3:05am
	asalamu aliakum i would like to hear objective views on the above topic. i know a sister who is married for the second time. she has a seventeen year old son. each time the sister has a fallout withe her hubby, she moves out of the bed, and sleeps on the floor in the other bedroom. and when this happens, her seventeen year old son sleeps with her in the same bed. her husband is very upset about this. apprarently this is a common practice in this area. in fact some married couples even share a bed with members of their extended familes. they see nothing wrong with this, according to them its an old practice and they are not acting in an unacceptable way secondly, some single moms, may opt to share a bed with their young children. e.g u have a single mom sharing a bed with her 3 year old son. at what age should this practice stop. when does this behaviour become inappropriate? then theres the issue of nudity? being a single mother of boys, at times it hard to know when to draw the line. often at night its so hot and u dont wanna wear too many items of clothing. yet at the same time, u dont wanna expose your children (especially males) to your nudity? is there any ruling on these issues? what is the islamic position here?