hate living in Saudi Arabia; husband won't move

Message Topic Search Topic Options Post Reply Create New Topic Printable Version Translate Topic

Asslamu
Alikum 

 Dear sister in Islam, I feel of you and all foreigners who live in KSA.
although I was born here and my dad came here before 40 years, we are still
called forefingers. I was brought up to understand you are strange and foreigner.
You are not Saudi. From my childhood I still remember when the teacher call for
the foreigners to be out of the class to check their ID cards. The teacher took
my brother's bag when he was 6 years old and let him back home without it
crying  because he forgot to bring the ID
card which proves he is a human being.

Even now we grow up in the work field still called foreigners. In fact, they
have an idea that the foreigner is not a complete human being. 

But sister I
am not here fro them... my country is more beautiful than here. I ma here because
of  Meidna is not Saudi it is Muslim.
This is the city of the prophet, peace be upon him and every Muslim has the
right to live her..

  After that I say sister you have mentioned the dirt and bad environment and
add to that the way of treating you after all this is an Islamic society. If
the dirt here is on the streets the dirt there is VERY bad. It is in hearts, in
faith. Sister look at the Non-Muslim society. It is a real hell. And forgive me
if I say they live as animals. No faith No Rules. Crimes every where. Look at
girls bothered and hit because of wearing Hijab but it is fine to go out with
bikini. Sister please sit with yourself and judge the amount of dirt and the
true bad environment in all non-Muslim societies.

Dear you have
to thank Allah because He  has taken you
out of the Hell and bless you with Islam and the Muslim society. I swear many
Muslims are dying to be in your place. They want just to pray for Allah and
wear their Hijab. I know many pray to Allah and cry to move to Muslim
countries. 

Sister we
are not live for ever, to die with Muslims and be buried with them and get the
mercy is better that dying and be buried with them in that Hell. There is no excuse for a true Muslim who can move to a Muslim society to stay in a non- Muslim society. 

I think my
idea is clear and this aya is a very good remind. I know you may disagree and
many may disagree but I said what I feel is true for the sake of Allah and
Islam.

4.97  When angels take the souls of those who die
in sin against their souls,

they  say: "In what (plight) Were ye?"
They reply: "Weak and oppressed Were we in

the  earth." They say: "Was not the
earth of God spacious enough for you to move 

yourselves

 away (From evil)?"
Such men will find their abode in Hell,- What an evil 

refuge!
-

4.98  Except those who are
(really) weak and oppressed - men, women, and 

children
- who have no means in their power, nor (a guide-post) to their way.

4.99  For these, there is
hope that God will forgive: For God doth blot out

(sins)  and forgive again
and again.

4.100  He who forsakes his
home in the cause of God, finds in the earth Many a 

refuge,
wide and spacious: Should he die as a refugee from home for God and His 

Apostle,
His reward becomes due and sure with God: And God is Oft-forgiving, Most

 Merciful.

Edited by Full of Hopes - 14 September 2009 at 3:34am

Author	Message Topic Search Topic Options Post Reply Create New Topic Printable Version Translate Topic
Full of Hopes Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Female Joined: 06 August 2009 Status: Offline Points: 855	Post Options Post Reply Quote Full of Hopes Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Topic: hate living in Saudi Arabia; husband won't move Posted: 14 September 2009 at 2:55am
	Asslamu Alikum Dear sister in Islam, I feel of you and all foreigners who live in KSA. although I was born here and my dad came here before 40 years, we are still called forefingers. I was brought up to understand you are strange and foreigner. You are not Saudi. From my childhood I still remember when the teacher call for the foreigners to be out of the class to check their ID cards. The teacher took my brother's bag when he was 6 years old and let him back home without it crying because he forgot to bring the ID card which proves he is a human being. Even now we grow up in the work field still called foreigners. In fact, they have an idea that the foreigner is not a complete human being. But sister I am not here fro them... my country is more beautiful than here. I ma here because of Meidna is not Saudi it is Muslim. This is the city of the prophet, peace be upon him and every Muslim has the right to live her.. After that I say sister you have mentioned the dirt and bad environment and add to that the way of treating you after all this is an Islamic society. If the dirt here is on the streets the dirt there is VERY bad. It is in hearts, in faith. Sister look at the Non-Muslim society. It is a real hell. And forgive me if I say they live as animals. No faith No Rules. Crimes every where. Look at girls bothered and hit because of wearing Hijab but it is fine to go out with bikini. Sister please sit with yourself and judge the amount of dirt and the true bad environment in all non-Muslim societies. Dear you have to thank Allah because He has taken you out of the Hell and bless you with Islam and the Muslim society. I swear many Muslims are dying to be in your place. They want just to pray for Allah and wear their Hijab. I know many pray to Allah and cry to move to Muslim countries. Sister we are not live for ever, to die with Muslims and be buried with them and get the mercy is better that dying and be buried with them in that Hell. There is no excuse for a true Muslim who can move to a Muslim society to stay in a non- Muslim society. I think my idea is clear and this aya is a very good remind. I know you may disagree and many may disagree but I said what I feel is true for the sake of Allah and Islam. 4.97 When angels take the souls of those who die in sin against their souls, they say: "In what (plight) Were ye?" They reply: "Weak and oppressed Were we in the earth." They say: "Was not the earth of God spacious enough for you to move yourselves away (From evil)?" Such men will find their abode in Hell,- What an evil refuge! - 4.98 Except those who are (really) weak and oppressed - men, women, and children - who have no means in their power, nor (a guide-post) to their way. 4.99 For these, there is hope that God will forgive: For God doth blot out (sins) and forgive again and again. 4.100 He who forsakes his home in the cause of God, finds in the earth Many a refuge, wide and spacious: Should he die as a refugee from home for God and His Apostle, His reward becomes due and sure with God: And God is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful. Edited by Full of Hopes - 14 September 2009 at 3:34am
	And whoever seeks a religion other than Isl�m, it will never be accepted of him, and in the Hereafter he will be one of the losers(3:85)

fais Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Joined: 24 August 2009 Location: Oman Status: Offline Points: 344	Post Options Post Reply Quote fais Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 13 September 2009 at 11:54pm
	slamoalaikum sister, i can understand your situtation as i am married to my cousin who is of saudi culture and when i go to her house i feel so lonly.anyways first thing my advise is take islam seriously dont just follow it because its your husbands deen,belive me u will get peace if learn islam. u know americans and brits love to work in saudi as they get tax free income,i have my british manager who worked in saudi for 20yrs. your problem is your financial status beacuse which u cant enjoy things in saudi,there are many things to do in saudi if u r rich,u can have compound accomodation where u can move freely and so,plus what u can do is open a daycare centre belive me u will mint money if do this as u r american and saudis have craze for american teachers.its not easy but very profitable.my true advice to you dont leave ur girl child alone she will be spoiled and be involved in realtions and then she will have no value for islam,god forbid. i dont understand one thing,all your childrens are having american nationality so they should get social security expenses which is arround 500 usd each child if i am not wrong,so 2000usd is a good ammount

momoffour Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter Joined: 13 September 2008 Location: Saudi Arabia Status: Offline Points: 7	Post Options Post Reply Quote momoffour Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 03 May 2009 at 2:33pm
	Lulu, Asalam Alaikum, welcome to Saudi Arabia....... I can't seem to send you a private message and I can't find your email address. I do not want to give out my email address through this venue either. Not sure how to get in touch with each other. Keep in touch and we'll figure it out! Salams

Lulu Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter Female Joined: 02 May 2009 Location: Saudi Arabia Status: Offline Points: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote Lulu Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 02 May 2009 at 7:35am
	Salam. I am new here in KSA. I wouls love to be friends with you as I am getting some 'West withdrawal' symptoms ... please sent me your contact to my email. I am in Rehab Jeddah right now and moved here 1 month ago. masalam. Lulu

momoffour Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter Joined: 13 September 2008 Location: Saudi Arabia Status: Offline Points: 7	Post Options Post Reply Quote momoffour Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 05 March 2009 at 11:05am
	Asalam Alaikum..... Sr. Asma, wow I like what you had to say. Not all of it applies to me or my particular situation, but I really appreciate you taking the time writing and acknowledging me and this problem which certainly I'm not the only one who suffers from. I wish life were as easy as you made it sound. And we all have our problems and issues. Humdullilah for all that I have and all that Allah is keeping from me, this is his plan. Insh'allah I will grow from this experience and my family and I will be better for it. Thanks again.....

Hayfa Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368	Post Options Post Reply Quote Hayfa Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 05 March 2009 at 9:39am
	Salaams SrAsma, welcome to the forum... you had alot of great insights. We are our own group you are right.. i am in karachi now.. and it feels the same what you wrote.. i can live in US and have the comfort, but Islam is not there. I come here and there is Islam but lack of social network.. you put it aptly and timely for me! Hayfa
	When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi

Sr. Asma Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter Joined: 04 March 2009 Location: Saudi Arabia Status: Offline Points: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote Sr. Asma Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 04 March 2009 at 9:08am
	Salam to all. I think a lot of us reverts or converts to Islam have the same problems...no one can relate to us. Although I have lived in Saudi for 13yrs, I am still basically alone... Being from Illinois it seems I "gave up" being an American once I took Islam...but I am some what "forgiven" for this once the person knows I spent time in the active Army as an MP in Desert Storm. Americans who are not Muslims have trouble relating to my Islam...we are from the same background, but Islam is a big part of a Muslim's life and the relating stops. Saudi or other Arabs have an equally hard time relating to us...we have Islam in common, but not the rest... As an American Muslim I have found myself "on the outside looking in" here in Saudi and in the US (lived there for 14mos with my 15 and 13yr old girls). When I was in the US I could have taken off my hijab and looked like any other Swedish/German woman...but with hijab I am Muslim...another nationality. I kept my hijab and learned a lot about myself. As new Muslims it took a lot of backbone to change our religion and for many of us to go against not only our culture, but our families as well. When we are trying to fit in with either the Americans or the Arabic cultures we are not standing on our own and staying strong like we were when we took shahadda. I have talked with many Arabs and their comments are always how "good" new Muslims are and how much they respect us for changing our religion... I would almost say this (more than the different backgrounds) is what blocks the Arabs from making friendships with us...they admire us and set us above them in the Islamic area...wouldn't want us to see them as not such perfect Muslims. Think of the German who knows English, but refuses to speak it until the American attempts speaking German first...the German doesn't want to be the first to look bad (lived in Bavaria for 3yrs). I know Saudis judge non-Saudis...there are many ways to deal with this but the one I found works best is to do what my cat did to my Saudi husband...kept going to my husband, lay down next to him and wait for a pat and one day it came. Be nice to the ones that seem the most judgmental...it drives them crazy and all people are nosey about others, they will eventually either leave you alone, or talk with you and not bother you again. Not speaking Arabic is a problem. Arabs view a person who doesn't try learning Arabic as stuck-up and putting themselves above the Arab. You don't want to learn, that�s fine, but try meeting in the middle... When the Arab talks to you in Arabic say (just learn one phrase in Arabic to help yourself) your "Sorry, Arabic is very difficult for me. Do you speak English?" This will go a long way in helping you feel less judged by them. Entertainment...ah, this is a problem. You can fight against the culture of staying up late/wake up late (can't change it) or just accept that's the way it is. There were things I didn't like about Germany...but once I accepted it I enjoyed the culture there (was the first American beerfrau in the area I lived in). I didn't see where your husband works...if he doesn't work for Aramco or one of the companies that has compounds then life is more difficult, but not insurmountable. Contact the embassy - see if there are American groups in the area and what is available to you. Now is when you have to think of the pioneers on the prairie...you have to be strong for your kids and find things to keep them busy in the home. Help them learn a musical instrument if you learned one when you were young (it comes back trust me!), the three of you learn another language [Spanish etc] together, or go for walks on the beach. Khobar has a nice Science museum...do you have one in your area? Friends...have you tried contacting Discover Islam in your area? This group will have other Americans who have become Muslims...ah, finally the common group you were looking for Take it one day at a time and accept you are unique as a new Muslim...we are a separate group and you have to find your friends with us

Hayfa Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368	Post Options Post Reply Quote Hayfa Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 23 September 2008 at 8:40pm
	Salaams OmAbdullah, How inspiring! I pray to live in a Muslim country someday. And you are right it is your intentions.. ultimately to try and please Allah. Hayfa
	When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi