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Sunan Abi Dawud 2136 (Book 12, Hadith 91) #22427
Asking Permission in Marriage

SUMMARY: The hadith is about the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) asking permission from his wives before visiting them, and how Aishah responded to this.

Narrated 'Aishah: The Messenger of Allah used to aske our permission on the day he had to stay with one of his wives (by turns) after the following Qur'anic verse was revealed: "You may distance those whom you like, and draw close to those whom you like" 33:51. The narrator Mu'adhah said: I said to her: What did you say to the Messenger of Allah ? She said: I used to say: If had an option for that, I would not preferred anyone to myself.
حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى بْنُ مَعِينٍ، وَمُحَمَّدُ بْنُ عِيسَى، - الْمَعْنَى - قَالاَ حَدَّثَنَا عَبَّادُ بْنُ عَبَّادٍ، عَنْ عَاصِمٍ، عَنْ مُعَاذَةَ، عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، قَالَتْ كَانَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ يَسْتَأْذِنُنَا إِذَا كَانَ فِي يَوْمِ الْمَرْأَةِ مِنَّا بَعْدَ مَا نَزَلَتْ ‏{‏ تُرْجِي مَنْ تَشَاءُ مِنْهُنَّ وَتُؤْوِي إِلَيْكَ مَنْ تَشَاءُ ‏}‏ قَالَتْ مُعَاذَةُ فَقُلْتُ لَهَا مَا كُنْتِ تَقُولِينَ لِرَسُولِ اللَّهِ قَالَتْ كُنْتُ أَقُولُ إِنْ كَانَ ذَلِكَ إِلَىَّ لَمْ أُوثِرْ أَحَدًا عَلَى نَفْسِي

TOPICS
marriage  *  permission  *  respect  *  quran

QUICK LESSONS:
Ask your spouse's consent before making decisions or taking actions which involve both parties; Show respect towards your spouse; Communicate openly with your spouse; Be willing to accept their opinion even if it differs from yours; Strengthen your relationship with each other through communication and understanding .

EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith speaks of the importance of respect and communication in marriage. It was narrated by Aishah that when the verse “You may distance those whom you like, and draw close to those whom you like” [ 33:51 ] was revealed in the Qur’an, Prophet Muhammad would ask for permission from his wives before visiting them. When asked what she said to him when he asked for her permission, Aishah replied that if she had an option for that she would not have preferred anyone else over herself. This shows us how important it is to show respect towards our spouses and communicate with them openly. We should always ask for their consent before making any decisions or taking any actions which involve both parties. Furthermore we should also be willing to accept their opinion even if it differs from ours as this will help strengthen our relationship with each other.

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