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Sunan an-Nasai 3244 (Book 26, Hadith 49) #17856
Marriage Advice from the Prophet (PBUH)

SUMMARY: The hadith is about a woman who was divorced three times and the Prophet (PBUH) advised her to marry Usamah bin Zaid.

It was narrated from Muhammad bin 'Abdur-Rahman bin Thawban that they asked Fatimah bint Qais about her story and she said: "My husband divorced me three times, and he used to provide me with food that was not good". She said: "By Allah, if I were entitled to maintenance and accommodation I would demand them and I would not accept this". The deputy said: "You are not entitled to accommodation or maintenance". She said: "I came to the Prophet and told him about that, and he said: 'You are not entitled to accommodation nor maintenance; observe your 'Iddah in the house of so-and-so'. She said: 'His Companions used to go to her'. Then he said: 'Observe your 'Iddah in the house of Ibn Umm Maktum, who is blind, and when your 'Iddah is over, let me know'." She said: "When my 'Iddah was over, I let him know. The Messenger of Allah said: 'Who has proposed marriage to you?' I said: 'Mu'awiyah and another man from the Quraish'. He said: 'As for Mu'awiyah, he is a boy among the Quraish and does not have anything, and as for the other he is a bad man with no goodness in him. Rather you should marry Usamah bin Zaid'." She said: "I did not like the idea". But he said that to her three times so she married him.
أَخْبَرَنِي حَاجِبُ بْنُ سُلَيْمَانَ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا حَجَّاجٌ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا ابْنُ أَبِي ذِئْبٍ، عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ، وَيَزِيدُ بْنُ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ قُسَيْطٍ، عَنْ أَبِي سَلَمَةَ بْنِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ، وَعَنِ الْحَارِثِ بْنِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ بْنِ ثَوْبَانَ، أَنَّهُمَا سَأَلاَ فَاطِمَةَ بِنْتَ قَيْسٍ عَنْ أَمْرِهَا، فَقَالَتْ طَلَّقَنِي زَوْجِي ثَلاَثًا فَكَانَ يَرْزُقُنِي طَعَامًا فِيهِ شَىْءٌ فَقُلْتُ وَاللَّهِ لَئِنْ كَانَتْ لِي النَّفَقَةُ وَالسُّكْنَى لأَطْلُبَنَّهَا وَلاَ أَقْبَلُ هَذَا ‏.‏ فَقَالَ الْوَكِيلُ لَيْسَ لَكِ سُكْنَى وَلاَ نَفَقَةٌ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ فَأَتَيْتُ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ فَذَكَرْتُ ذَلِكَ لَهُ فَقَالَ ‏"‏ لَيْسَ لَكِ سُكْنَى وَلاَ نَفَقَةٌ فَاعْتَدِّي عِنْدَ فُلاَنَةَ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ وَكَانَ يَأْتِيهَا أَصْحَابُهُ ثُمَّ قَالَ ‏"‏ اعْتَدِّي عِنْدَ ابْنِ أُمِّ مَكْتُومٍ فَإِنَّهُ أَعْمَى فَإِذَا حَلَلْتِ فَآذِنِينِي ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ فَلَمَّا حَلَلْتُ آذَنْتُهُ فَقَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ ‏"‏ وَمَنْ خَطَبَكِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ فَقُلْتُ مُعَاوِيَةُ وَرَجُلٌ آخَرُ مِنْ قُرَيْشٍ ‏.‏ فَقَالَ النَّبِيُّ ﷺ ‏"‏ أَمَّا مُعَاوِيَةُ فَإِنَّهُ غُلاَمٌ مِنْ غِلْمَانِ قُرَيْشٍ لاَ شَىْءَ لَهُ وَأَمَّا الآخَرُ فَإِنَّهُ صَاحِبُ شَرٍّ لاَ خَيْرَ فِيهِ وَلَكِنِ انْكِحِي أُسَامَةَ بْنَ زَيْدٍ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ فَكَرِهْتُهُ ‏.‏ فَقَالَ لَهَا ذَلِكَ ثَلاَثَ مَرَّاتٍ فَنَكَحَتْهُ
TOPICS
divorce  *  marriage  *  advice  *  zaid

QUICK LESSONS:
Seek advice from elders when facing difficult situations in life; Be humble enough to accept their guidance even if it does not seem appealing at first; Make wise decisions for your future; Marry someone suitable according to Islamic teachings; Respect your spouse's decision even if you do not agree with them initially; Follow Islamic teachings regarding divorce proceedings etc..

EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith is about a woman who was divorced three times by her husband and she came to the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ for advice. The Prophet ﷺ told her that she was not entitled to accommodation or maintenance but should observe her 'Iddah in the house of Ibn Umm Maktum who was blind. When her 'Iddah period ended, he asked if anyone proposed marriage to her and she said two men did - Mu'awiyah and another man from Quraish. He advised that she should marry Mu'awiyah as he was young among Quraish but had nothing while the other man was bad with no goodness in him so instead she should marry Usama Bin Zaid which she did not like at first but eventually agreed after being advised thrice by the Prophet ﷺ . This hadith teaches us that we must always seek advice from our elders when facing difficult situations in life as they have more experience than us and can guide us better towards making wise decisions for our future. It also teaches us that we must always be humble enough to accept advice even if it does not seem appealing at first because it may turn out beneficial for us in the long run.

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