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Sahih Muslim 1478 (Book 18, Hadith 39) #10827
Kindness and Gentleness in Difficult Situations

SUMMARY: This hadith is about the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) teaching people to be kind and gentle, even when they are in a difficult situation.

Jabir b. 'Abdullah (Allah be pleased with them) reported: Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) came and sought permission to see Allah's Messenger ﷺ. He found people sitting at his door and none amongst them had been granted permission, but it was granted to Abu Bakr and he went in. Then came 'Umar and he sought permission and it was granted to him, and he found Allah's Apostle ﷺ sitting sad and silent with his wives around him. He (Hadrat 'Umar) said: I would say something which would make the Prophet ﷺ laugh, so he said: Messenger of Allah, I wish you had seen (the treatment meted out to) the daughter of Khadija when you asked me some money, and I got up and slapped her on her neck. Allah's Messenger (mav peace be upon him) laughed and said: They are around me as you see, asking for extra money. Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) then got up went to 'A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) and slapped her on the neck, and 'Umar stood up before Hafsa and slapped her saying: You ask Allah's Messenger ﷺ which he does not possess. They said: By Allah, we do not ask Allah's Messenger ﷺ for anything he does not possess. Then he withdrew from them for a month or for twenty-nine days. Then this verse was revealed to him:" Prophet: Say to thy wives. for a mighty reward" (xxxiii. 28). He then went first to 'A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) and said: I want to propound something to you, 'A'isha, but wish no hasty reply before you consult your parents. She said: Messenger of Allah, what is that? He (the Holy Prophet) recited to her the verse, whereupon she said: Is it about you that I should consult my parents, Messenger of Allah? Nay, I choose Allah, His Messenger, and the Last Abode; but I ask you not to tell any of your wives what I have said He replied: Not one of them will ask me without my informing her. God did not send me to be harsh, or cause harm, but He has sent me to teach and make things easy.
وَحَدَّثَنَا زُهَيْرُ بْنُ حَرْبٍ، حَدَّثَنَا رَوْحُ بْنُ عُبَادَةَ، حَدَّثَنَا زَكَرِيَّاءُ بْنُ إِسْحَاقَ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو الزُّبَيْرِ، عَنْ جَابِرِ بْنِ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ، قَالَ دَخَلَ أَبُو بَكْرٍ يَسْتَأْذِنُ عَلَى رَسُولِ اللَّهِ ﷺ فَوَجَدَ النَّاسَ جُلُوسًا بِبَابِهِ لَمْ يُؤْذَنْ لأَحَدٍ مِنْهُمْ - قَالَ - فَأُذِنَ لأَبِي بَكْرٍ فَدَخَلَ ثُمَّ أَقْبَلَ عُمَرُ فَاسْتَأْذَنَ فَأُذِنَ لَهُ فَوَجَدَ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ جَالِسًا حَوْلَهُ نِسَاؤُهُ وَاجِمًا سَاكِتًا - قَالَ - فَقَالَ لأَقُولَنَّ شَيْئًا أُضْحِكُ النَّبِيَّ ﷺ فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ لَوْ رَأَيْتَ بِنْتَ خَارِجَةَ سَأَلَتْنِي النَّفَقَةَ فَقُمْتُ إِلَيْهَا فَوَجَأْتُ عُنُقَهَا ‏.‏ فَضَحِكَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ ﷺ وَقَالَ ‏"‏ هُنَّ حَوْلِي كَمَا تَرَى يَسْأَلْنَنِي النَّفَقَةَ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ فَقَامَ أَبُو بَكْرٍ إِلَى عَائِشَةَ يَجَأُ عُنُقَهَا فَقَامَ عُمَرُ إِلَى حَفْصَةَ يَجَأُ عُنُقَهَا كِلاَهُمَا يَقُولُ تَسْأَلْنَ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ﷺ مَا لَيْسَ عِنْدَهُ ‏.‏ فَقُلْنَ وَاللَّهِ لاَ نَسْأَلُ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ﷺ شَيْئًا أَبَدًا لَيْسَ عِنْدَهُ ثُمَّ اعْتَزَلَهُنَّ شَهْرًا أَوْ تِسْعًا وَعِشْرِينَ ثُمَّ نَزَلَتْ عَلَيْهِ هَذِهِ الآيَةُ ‏{‏ يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ قُلْ لأَزْوَاجِكَ‏}‏ حَتَّى بَلَغَ ‏{‏ لِلْمُحْسِنَاتِ مِنْكُنَّ أَجْرًا عَظِيمًا‏}‏ قَالَ فَبَدَأَ بِعَائِشَةَ فَقَالَ ‏"‏ يَا عَائِشَةُ إِنِّي أُرِيدُ أَنْ أَعْرِضَ عَلَيْكَ أَمْرًا أُحِبُّ أَنْ لاَ تَعْجَلِي فِيهِ حَتَّى تَسْتَشِيرِي أَبَوَيْكِ ‏"‏ ‏.‏ قَالَتْ وَمَا هُوَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ فَتَلاَ عَلَيْهَا الآيَةَ قَالَتْ أَفِيكَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ أَسْتَشِيرُ أَبَوَىَّ بَلْ أَخْتَارُ اللَّهَ وَرَسُولَهُ وَالدَّارَ الآخِرَةَ وَأَسْأَلُكَ أَنْ لاَ تُخْبِرَ امْرَأَةً مِنْ نِسَائِكَ بِالَّذِي قُلْتُ ‏.‏ قَالَ ‏"‏ لاَ تَسْأَلُنِي امْرَأَةٌ مِنْهُنَّ إِلاَّ أَخْبَرْتُهَا إِنَّ اللَّهَ لَمْ يَبْعَثْنِي مُعَنِّتًا وَلاَ مُتَعَنِّتًا وَلَكِنْ بَعَثَنِي مُعَلِّمًا مُيَسِّرًا
TOPICS
mercy  *  reward  *  kindness  *  gentleness  *  situations  *  rahmah  *  ujr

QUICK LESSONS:
Strive towards being kind no matter what situation you are in .

EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith is about the Prophet Muhammad's teachings on kindness and gentleness even when faced with difficult situations. In this hadith, Abu Bakr and Umar come to visit the Prophet Muhammad but find him sad and silent surrounded by his wives who were asking for extra money. Abu Bakr then goes to Aisha's room and slaps her on the neck while Umar does the same to Hafsa. The Prophet was upset by their actions as he did not want them to be harsh or cause harm but instead wanted them to teach others through gentleness. As a result of this incident, Allah revealed a verse that said "Prophet! Say unto thy wives for a mighty reward". This verse teaches us that we should always strive for kindness even when faced with difficult situations as it will bring us great rewards from Allah SWT. We should also remember that Allah SWT has sent us here not only to teach others but also make things easy for them so we should always strive towards being kind no matter what situation we are in.

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