Salam!

Firstly i need to know if it is haram talking on the phone and chatting with a male, cos i am aware dating is but what if you are far away from eachother and never met but only share Islamic and general views by chatting ?

Secondly, we were taking about shaking hands and i said it was haram in islam to have any physical contact with a female be it a handshake or worse, he said to me on what verse or hadith did i see that.

Pls i remember but not clearly may be in a hadith, that a man would rather face a certain pain or torture than touch a woman's hand his right hand does not posses. Can someone help me with the verse or hadith or something more scary or better.

He thinks i am an extremist but if i proove it in writen(hadith or quran) he promise to believe me and i pray would work on it inshaAllah.

It was narrated that Ma�qil ibn Yassaar said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: �For one of you to be stabbed in the head with an iron needle is better for him than that he should touch a woman who is not permissible for him.� 

Narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer, 486. Shaykh al-Albaani said in Saheeh al-Jaami�, 5045, that this hadeeth is saheeh. 

chastebeauty wrote: Salam! Firstly i need to know if it is haram talking on the phone and chatting with a male, cos i am aware dating is but what if you are far away from eachother and never met but only share Islamic and general views by chatting ?

Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah.

Idle chat per se may not be harmful. However, it may on occasions lead to somethings that turn out to be objectionable or haram in the religion. Anything that lead to haram, should be avoided, if not, a great deal of caution should be observed. That is for better piety.

The ummulmo'mineen were reminded in the Quran, to be stren in their voices, when they are speaking to men. This should be taken as a general advice for all women.

If the person is not your mahram, and there is no specific need for the discussion, it is better to avoid it. Unless ur sure, it will not lead somewhere else and you will not be misunderstood in any way. If there is a genuine need, at least try not to be alone with this person - or at least not alone in a lonely or confined area.

Talking to people on a discussion board is very different from chatting, or talking on phone. In the later case one is alone with a non-mahram and chances for improprieties are greater.

Western society sees things very differently, but islamic adab are there for a practical reason.

Hope this helps, insha allah.

Maa salaama,

Nausheen

Jazakallah khairan.What is the most appropriate islamic way for youths to know eachother in the early stage before liking eachother, talkless of making commitments towards Nikaah?. We can't involve parents at this stage cos i don't think we would want a situation where everyone you meet and part, your parents get to be involved.

Infact it might even scare him away if i bring up a case like that at this stage cos we haven't met,we only chat and talk on the phone ocassionally. 

I wasn't aware that dating was a sin in islam.  If you don't date, how do you find the wife that is trully right for you?  I am not talking about dating including sex, just dating.  I know premarrital sex is sin.

On the shaking hands part,

If I'm at a Muslim man's house and his wife is there, is it a sin for me to only shake her hand while greeting her?  That has nothing to do with dating or any bad intentions except a simple greeting.

"It's haram to even touch a womans hand. It's as if you commited zina - adultery - which is one of the most unforgivable sins in Islam."

That is a bit overstated - don't you think?  Unless, of course, you have text to support your assertion.  Forbidden, yes; but zina/adultery, and "most unforgivable" I think not.

Jazakallah khairan! to all of you that responded to my question.

My conclusion is, to be on the safe side, we rather stay away from all of these, after all ( what good will touching hands be to males and females?). All ur proves tie into one another.

Thank you,

Masalaam.

No not extreme, but the hadith has another version which indicates that these actions may lead to bigger sins, thus are certainly to be avoided.  However, the act of kissing does not carry the same punishment and is not seen as a major sin - as generally salat wipes away minor sins;

Narrated Ibn Mas'ud:

A man kissed a woman (unlawfully) and then went to the Prophet and informed him.

Allah revealed:

And offer prayers perfectly At the two ends of the day And in some hours of the night (i.e. the five compulsory prayers). Verily! good deeds remove (annul) the evil deeds (small sins) (11.114). The man asked Allah's Apostle, "Is it for me?" He said, "It is for all my followers."   Bukhari 1:504

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: �Allaah has decreed for every son of Adam his share of zina, which he will inevitably commit. The zina of the eyes is looking, the zina of the tongue is speaking, one may wish and desire, and the private parts confirm that or deny it.�

Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5889; Muslim, 2657

Salaam abuayisha,

Does this mean that every male will commit some form of zina in their life? That this is enevitable?  

Surely it is not every man.

Does this include accidents of zina commited by the eyes?

Salaam to everyone here.

And famallah for now.

Es_Selam'un Aleykum ve Rahmetullahi ve Berakatuh,

 Here is an link for u which you can find all of your answers,insh'Allah;short and very intensive with the signs from Islam...Wa Salaam.

http://muslim-canada.org/purdah.pdf - http://muslim-canada.org/purdah.pdf

Thank You Suleyman,

That link was most helpful, it has cleared up alot of questions.

falcon_shark wrote: Thank You Suleyman, That link was most helpful, it has cleared up alot of questions.

 My regrads brother,the link also includes my mistakes i made in my life...the best one is turning our faces to Allah,we need...Wa Salaam.