Assalamu'Alaikum,

I know the rulings and all of that so I'm not really asking is it Haram or Halal? I know that as Muslims we should avoid it but I just wanted to get a personal opinion of why you would or would not participate.

My family is not muslim and up until this last year(there have been 20) since I've been married foreverAlhamdulillah. My family understood we only celebrate Eid and respected that.

Well last week we had family movie night at our house and invited my mom "Grandma" and "Uncle"(my brother)  over for it we watched "The Bee Movie" we rarely watch non-Islamic but I really liked the story so I rented it. Towards the end Grandma came up with a grand plan that the kids should all come over and dye Easter Eggs at her house this week. I was shocked  I never expected that sort of spring break idea to pop into her head.

So I quietly blew it off I know bad daughter but I'm not even supposed to say OOF and at that moment the best I could do is smile and quietly say "I wasn't sure about our weekend plans yet".

Tuesday, Grandma calls~while I was making copies for homeschooling and got my son Nuh on the phone and went on and on about how much fun it would be.....Arrrrgh and than when I got on the phone my kids who have never done this were bouncing all over the room talking about duckies and bunnies etc....

This OOOF thing has been a super big challenge for me lately

So I again mentioned that if the weather got back into the 40's I'd love to take the kids for a picnic to the Detroit Zoo if she would like to come. The boys love to polar bear glass tunnel and the monkeys etc.

She's just gunho on the whole eggs bit and they're so expensive now too. I told her I'd talk to my husband when he came home from work for lunch and let her know....I know...I know really bad daughter I should of just ripped the bandaid off and said "NO"

Well I approached the issue over lunch and my husband said he'd call her when he got back to the office and just invite her to come spend the weekend or anytime she has free with us and he'd explain that we didn't celebrate these holidays but the kids would love to spend time with her doing different activities.

She hasn't called in days....I know she's really upsetwith me I can almost picture my middle name being said everytime she mentions me in conversation

So what would you do stand firm...be polite....or just cave and do some pagan holiday ritual that has nothing to do with Isa(as) at all?

JazakAllahuKhair

I think you did the right thing, about not sending them.

Just call them and talk, if everything seems to be normal then there is no problem I guess, however if there is a problem then I think you need to explain why you do not want your kids celebrating such an event. Just try to do a comparison, for example ask if they would let there children celebrate something which has Islamic roots or any other (religious root).

However more importantly, I think you need to explain to your children in a nice way why we Muslims do not celebrate such a thing, and just to make them understand the importance of our celebrations and how much better it is.

Plus lets ""keep it real"", there your kids so you decide what they celebrate or dont.

JazakAllahuKhair,

I am planning on calling her tomorrow morning before she leaves for work. But after she has her coffee.The advantage of being the kid you get to know the best time to approach you parents even if you are all grown up.

The kids do understand and my family understands the reasons we don't celebrate...That's why it felt like there was a wrench thrown in the works last week when my mom made the invitation to them to go over to her house.

It was just so frustrating because when mom called on Tuesday she made the whole event sound so interesting and fun like some kind of forbidden fruit that the kids were almost disappointed. We have a vhs tape called the truth about Holidays' they've seen it before but I pulled it out again in the evening and we watched it together.

To be honest my mom should watch it...it's kind of sad how so many of the holidays' have pagan roots tied into the Christian faith.

Well that'll be for another time~Insha'Allah everything will work out .

JazakAllahuKhair again for the advice.

It is not an accident that Christmas falls on the Winter solstice and Easter on the spring equinox. Cabin fever sets in and people need something to look forward to at these times of the year. Other cultures also have celebrations at about the same times. Persians, Kurds and others celebrate Nowrooz, Chinese celebrate new year, etc, etc.

Be that as it may, I have no problem celebrating the resurrection of a bunny that lays chocolate eggs or the birthday of a jolly old man who works for Toys-R-us and flies a sled.

Allah (swt) did not forbid �fun� especially for kids.

 There is no harm in meeting the relatives and parents. That was the good way of the holy prophet and his companions. It was the pagans and Kuffar who forbade meeting / mixing with momineen (believers). Prophet did not do it.

 Even at a time that the relative (or a relative) of Hazrat Abu Bakr was a staunch enemy of Islam and Hazrat Abubakr decided to stop the funds that he used to provide and said openly that he (Abubakr) will not give any funds to the relative. It came to the notice of the holy prophet s.a.w.s. The holy prophet called Hazrat Abubakr and told him not to stop any aid to the opponent.

 That should be a good example for any one who believes in cutting off relations with non muslims. I had explained before. Allah is Al-Rehman and  Al-Raheem. He does not like that relations of the womb (Rehm) to be cut off. If any one will break the relations of the womb then Allah will not accept his Dua'a, his prayers.

 Our children, if we are bringing them up properly, will not fall a prey to the bad customs of the non muslims so quickly. Rather, our children will be kind and gentle to the other children and will not raise any hue and cry over the bad customs of the non muslims. We need not fear a few meetings with non muslim children every six months or two months.

 The question of Kufr?? Not all are Kaafirs. They may be non believing in islam but they need not be kaafir. It is wrong to translate the word kaafir as "disbeliever or non believer". That is a very light view of the word Kaafir. Kaafir is a staunch enemy of Islam.

 Please look at the new film which has been released on the net about Islam and Quran. The film is called Fitnah. It is released by a person in holland. He gives some examples of the severe words of the Quran about killing the kuffar. Smite them where you find them. Break their necks etc. The reason for all that is the wrong translation of the word Kaafir.

 They say that it is ordered to kill the non believers (Kaafirs). See verse 4 of chapter 47. They say that the Islam is a terrorist religion.

[47:4] And when you meet in regular battle those who disbelieve, smite their necks; and, when you have overcome them, by causing great slaughter among them, bind fast the fetters - then afterwards either release them as a favour or by taking ransom - until the war lays down its burdens. That is the ordinance. And if Allah had so pleased, He could have punished them Himself, but He has willed that He may try some of you by others. And those who are killed in the way of Allah - He will never render their works vain.

 If the translation was done correctly, nobody could mislead the public. Nobody could have made a film. The translation should be as follows:

[47:4] And when you meet in regular battle those who are enemies of Islam, smite their necks; and, when you have overcome them, by causing great slaughter among them, bind fast the fetters - then afterwards either release them as a favour or by taking ransom - until the war lays down its burdens. That is the ordinance. And if Allah had so pleased, He could have punished them Himself, but He has willed that He may try some of you by others. And those who are killed in the way of Allah - He will never render their works vain.

 Similarly, The word kaafir should be translated as an enemy of Islam. Not just disbeliever.

 Please note that all non-believers are not kaafirs. It is necessary to remain faithful in love with the non believing parents. It is necessary to serve them well and happily. It is necessary to meet them and to make them happy as much as possible. But it is not allowed to do anything against the will of Allah. Anything forbidden may not be done.

 Hazrat Abu Hurairah ( a companion of the holy prophet) had a non-believing mother. She was an utter enemy of the prophet. She abused the prophet quite a lot. Did Abuhurairah get rid of her?? No. Did he abondon her?? No. She was an enemy.

 One day she abused the prophet too much. Abu Hurairah was very upset and sad. He was weeping. He came to the prophet and said that he was very much hurt. His mother had abused the prophet too much.

 The holy prophet said to Abu Hurairah, "Let us pray for her." They both prayed for her guidance. That evening, when Abu Hurairah went back home, he felt there was a curtain and some sound of water flowing. He waited until his mother had finished the bath. She came out of the bath room and said loudly " There is no God but Allah and Muhammad is His messenger."

 The mother asked Abu Hurairah to take her to the prophet. The son was very happy to do that. So that is the way it is. In the case of Abraham a.s. it was same. he kept on persuading his father not to worship the idols. The Father did not agree. The father abused him. Abraham did not abondon his father. His father ordered him to leave the place and go away.

 In short, I may say that in Makkah and madinah, it was the enemies, the Kuffar who broke the ties. Not the believers. Is that not enough proof that relations should not be broken. The breaking of the relations is the practice of the enemies of Islam. So those in this forum who have a mixed family and some members are non muslims, it is the duty of the Muslims (believers) to keep good contact (relations) with non believing members.