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imah77 View Drop Down
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    Posted: 25 March 2007 at 4:47pm

I found this in another forum, and just had to share it :

A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog.



Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall.
In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.



In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.


He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.


As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, �What happened here today?� She again smiled and answered, �You know every day when you came home from work and ask me what in the world did I do today?� �Yes,� was his incredulous reply.

She answered, �Well, today I didn't do it.�


Edited by imah77
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taliyya View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote taliyya Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 March 2007 at 8:54am
. good one
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imah77 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote imah77 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2007 at 3:42am
This is another one:

___________________________________________________________

For those that have potential to be a parent and those that are already parents and can continue having more children....

Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child is different from having your first.

Your Clothes

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.

The Layette

1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries

1st baby: At the first sign of distress - a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.



Pacifier

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every 2 to 3 hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

Activities

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, BabySwing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Swallowing Coins (my favorite one)

1st child: when first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
2nd child: when 2nd child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for coin to pass.
3rd child: when 3rd child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!!


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abuayisha View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote abuayisha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2007 at 5:58pm
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Cassandra View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Cassandra Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2007 at 6:48pm

Ok:  So I said I wasn't going to post again.........

IMAH77: My children are now 29, and 33. I look at what you have posted and say to myself if only I had known.........

If all Moms out there, where-ever they are could read this, what a lot of time/money we could save in therapy years on!!! (Them too?)

Bravo for posting this.  My kids survived, even if at times I didn't!!!!

I count them as pretty reasonable human beings....but it came close!

This is an amazing insight a treasure.

P.S. I am now a child psychologist!

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imah77 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote imah77 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2007 at 7:06pm
Thank You Cassandra.

I am a Mom of 4 children, and the fifth is on the way.... Insha Allah.

So you can just imagine what being a parent to the 4th child is like...

And Bravo to you too... for having brought up your kids successfully to adulthood.

My kids are below 9 years old. I can't imagine what's it going to be like being a parent to teenagers, and later when they become adults and have a family of their own...

So maybe you can post something about being a parent to a teenager from your experiences.



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Cassandra View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Cassandra Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2007 at 7:42pm

 

Not original, but in general agreed with.On the whole, I prefer cats.  I have two. They eat and sleep, and occasionally want to be cuddled . They can be left alone. My children now live elsewhere!

For all of you with teenagers or who have had teenagers, you may want to know why they really have a lot in common with cats:

1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.

2. No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.

3. You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

4. Even if you tell jokes as well as (fill in the blanks) neither your cat nor your teen will ever crack a smile.

5. No cat or teenager shares your taste in music.

6. Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.

7. Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

8. Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner, communicating that ultimate human ecstasy -- a sense of complete and utter boredom.

9. Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone's furniture.

10. Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your bedroom. Teenagers are not above that sort of behavior.

Thus, if you must raise teenagers, the best sources of advice are not other parents, but veterinarians. It is also a good idea to keep a guidebook on cats at hand at all times. And remember, above all else, put out the food and do not make any sudden moves in their direction. When they make up their minds, they will finally come to you for some affection and comfort, and it will be a triumphant moment for all concerned.

 

NOTE FROM CASSIE:  It is not endless.  Persevere, They will eventually re-enter the Human Species and (I am still waiting) give you Grandchildren. After that, you are on your own!

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