Sons unsure on telling their mom I have remarried

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   I am 45 years old and married and have been blessed with two sons from my first wife. Subhanallah they are 16 and 14. I have recently taken a second wife. She is an 19 year orphan girl with no brothers to protect her. Allah has blessed me with enough financial security to support my family and take a second wife. My first wife is unaware that I have remarried though--only my sons know. They served as the two male witnesses for the nikah.

My eldest son gave me his blessing to remarry. He says I am doing a good thing by protecting this girl and he sees how happy she makes me and he is happy for me. All he asked is that I never let my first wife, his mother, know about the existence of my second wife because it would make his mother jealous and he does not like to see her upset.

My youngest son, however, thinks this will hurt his mother as I am hiding the truth from her and he has told me to tell her about my remarriage. My youngest son says that as a Muslim man, truth is incumbent upon me and I cannot lie to my first wife.

Which son's advice on whether I should tell my first wife or not about taking a second wife is following the guidance of Allah? Islamically, am I allowed to take a second wife without the first one knowing?

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mihir-wohra Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter. Male Islam Joined: 31 October 2021 Location: Turkey Status: Offline Points: 3	Post Options Post Reply Quote mihir-wohra Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Topic: Sons unsure on telling their mom I have remarried Posted: 31 October 2021 at 3:17pm
	I am 45 years old and married and have been blessed with two sons from my first wife. Subhanallah they are 16 and 14. I have recently taken a second wife. She is an 19 year orphan girl with no brothers to protect her. Allah has blessed me with enough financial security to support my family and take a second wife. My first wife is unaware that I have remarried though--only my sons know. They served as the two male witnesses for the nikah. My eldest son gave me his blessing to remarry. He says I am doing a good thing by protecting this girl and he sees how happy she makes me and he is happy for me. All he asked is that I never let my first wife, his mother, know about the existence of my second wife because it would make his mother jealous and he does not like to see her upset. My youngest son, however, thinks this will hurt his mother as I am hiding the truth from her and he has told me to tell her about my remarriage. My youngest son says that as a Muslim man, truth is incumbent upon me and I cannot lie to my first wife. Which son's advice on whether I should tell my first wife or not about taking a second wife is following the guidance of Allah? Islamically, am I allowed to take a second wife without the first one knowing?

Dr. Aslam Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Admin Group Male Islam Joined: 24 February 2018 Location: California, USA Status: Offline Points: 279	Post Options Post Reply Quote Dr. Aslam Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 03 November 2021 at 6:41pm
	Wa alaikum Salam, You should have asked these questions before taking a second wife. In the first place, monogamy is the rule. Polygamy is an exception. I personally do not support polygamy based on my understanding of the Quran, sunnah, social conditions and personal choices. Your first wife is your partner, and a partner means that she should know all the decisions pertaining to your family. You have done injustice to your first wife. Moreover, in marriages, minors are not accepted as witnesses. Please speak with your first wife and explain to her the circumstances that led to this decision of yours. Aslam
	Best Regards, Aslam Abdullah