i really need advice...

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   Salam, 

I'm looking for some advice, especially after endlessly researching online and finding no answers. I'm sorry if this is long. 

I'm an 18 year old girl and in the past year, developed anorexia. It's really hard to explain how it all happened. It wasn't about how I looked. I'll sum it up to the fact that a series of events led to another, my insecurities became insurmountable, depression & anxiety kicked in.. and I found myself in this terrible cycle. I never fully *realized* what I was doing to myself. I had always been confident and to be "anorexic" sounded silly (that was my denial). 

My family & friends realized there was a problem and I'm so grateful for them because they helped me find the help that I needed. With the help of them, a doctor, therapist, nutritionist etc. I'm gaining weight again and am feeling happier than ever. 

Earlier on in the year, during Ramadan, I had caught the flu so I had missed a few fasts. I was hoping to make up for them this coming week. 

However, I was wondering if this was safe for me to do? My BMI is still at the low end, and I am worried that this might trigger my eating disorder somehow. I'm also worried I'll lose weight by fasting in the next few days... which would be bad because my initial weight loss came with a bunch of problems that I'm still dealing with. Losing weight again would definitely harm that part of recovery. I know with fasting, what matters is Allah and not our daily problems - I'm just concerned because I'm supposed to eat a set amount of calories per day. 

 My doctor/nutritionist/therapist aren't muslim so I know their advice would be "No. Do. Not. Fast." But I don't think they really understand? & I cannot for the life of me find anything online about anorexia when it comes to muslims/ ramadan. 

I just dont know what to do. I want to fast, and one part of me is saying "if you lose weight etc. etc. it doesn't matter, you're fasting - that's good". but then the other part of me is really, really scared even a few days of fasting will harm me (emotionally and physically). 

I hope this didn't sound silly. I just have noone else to ask. 

=(

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tbsenny Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter Joined: 23 December 2010 Location: Australia Status: Offline Points: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote tbsenny Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Topic: i really need advice... Posted: 23 December 2010 at 9:29pm
	Salam, I'm looking for some advice, especially after endlessly researching online and finding no answers. I'm sorry if this is long. I'm an 18 year old girl and in the past year, developed anorexia. It's really hard to explain how it all happened. It wasn't about how I looked. I'll sum it up to the fact that a series of events led to another, my insecurities became insurmountable, depression & anxiety kicked in.. and I found myself in this terrible cycle. I never fully realized what I was doing to myself. I had always been confident and to be "anorexic" sounded silly (that was my denial). My family & friends realized there was a problem and I'm so grateful for them because they helped me find the help that I needed. With the help of them, a doctor, therapist, nutritionist etc. I'm gaining weight again and am feeling happier than ever. Earlier on in the year, during Ramadan, I had caught the flu so I had missed a few fasts. I was hoping to make up for them this coming week. However, I was wondering if this was safe for me to do? My BMI is still at the low end, and I am worried that this might trigger my eating disorder somehow. I'm also worried I'll lose weight by fasting in the next few days... which would be bad because my initial weight loss came with a bunch of problems that I'm still dealing with. Losing weight again would definitely harm that part of recovery. I know with fasting, what matters is Allah and not our daily problems - I'm just concerned because I'm supposed to eat a set amount of calories per day. My doctor/nutritionist/therapist aren't muslim so I know their advice would be "No. Do. Not. Fast." But I don't think they really understand? & I cannot for the life of me find anything online about anorexia when it comes to muslims/ ramadan. I just dont know what to do. I want to fast, and one part of me is saying "if you lose weight etc. etc. it doesn't matter, you're fasting - that's good". but then the other part of me is really, really scared even a few days of fasting will harm me (emotionally and physically). I hope this didn't sound silly. I just have noone else to ask. =(

Hayfa Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368	Post Options Post Reply Quote Hayfa Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 26 December 2010 at 6:08am
	Asalaam Alaikum, Welcome to the Forum.. Sorry no one replied earlier, must be the holidays. I would suspect that anorexia as a medical condition is like others, if it will do harm to ourselves we should not do it. People are saying no probably as, as you said the psychological and emotional reasons. Considering what you said about your BMI it makes sense not to fast. People often do not understand how life-threatening anorexia is. That is why you SHOULD be cautious maybe you can do extra prayers? Keep us posted Hayfa
	When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi