Sr. replies preferred

ASA,

i had a situation and i guess brs. can respond too but i would prefer srs most.

let me explain we have social friends really we only see them once and a while at our home or in passing at the mosque. 

i love the sr she is so nice but when i asked her last week why she wouldn't call or come by more often since we only live about a mile apart she looked away and changed the question.

i asked my husband later if i had done anything bad or rude to ever insult them like the tea not being strong enough or not having enough to put out for them to eat or something. he said "No" and than "Why" i told him she seemed to not be happy to visit with me. he said he didn't know why her husband was always happy to stop by.

than a week later my husband saw his friend at the mosque and his friend mentioned how nice the visit was. so when he told me this i was very lost on what happened to our friendship.

later she called and wanted to know if i could look up some information about travel on my computer for her since her computer wasn't working. i said sure and why not stop by and we could do it together. she said no just that she would call me back later next week.

now at this point i'm almost in tears wondering what is going on why is she so cold why hadn't we seen them for so long and what was it i had done that was so wrong or had not done that should of been done.

than it happened very awkward and horrifying and horrible that i had to tell my husband this and hope he would understand.

on friday i was going to the mosque for prayer and i had stopped to visit the Imams wife and her daughter and than on to mosque. i parked and suddenly a van pulled up blocking my car and her husband got out to greet me. it was emabarrasing there were other brs driving in one stopped to see if everything was okay. her husband who other than saying salaams to i've never even talked too said he wished he had a life like my husband and that he was very unhappy with his wife and i just felt like everything was spinning and seriously i thought i would pass out. i just said call my husband and talk to him.

my husband did not get upset and several brs mentioned to him in private that they saw a unknown br pull up suddenly in a strange way and stop and question me so i was happy to know that brs were honest and true and witness that i did nothing wrong.

so i don't know what to do... i don't want to see this br ever again i think i might throw-up, pass out or cry if i do and i think that's why she doesn't want to see me she thinks i am causing problems with her marriage.

Aminah

WAS,

thanks sis,

I will give it some time sometimes time is best.

Aminah

WAS UmmSami,

it is bizarre we've pretty much severed our ties to them. i do feel sad it had to end that way. his wife is leaving soon to go overseas, and she might not be back for several months or at all. i found out that he had been keeping her here in fear she mentioned to me before she left that she had wanted to leave for the past several years and when i asked why she hadn't taken the trip sooner. she said her husband had told her there was bird flu throughout the area and she couldn't go because she would fall ill even if she only ate a vegetarian diet. she trusted him without questioning him any further until just these past few weeks and than she just made her plans and ordered her tickets. i didn't say anything but i felt so sad for her inside that she never thought to question his response and maybe could have been in a different environment a long time ago.

i wish her the best and some peace because she hasn't had very much peace of mind for a long time. it's frightning to think of how much power and control a spouse can have.

Aminah

WAS,

thank you herjihad, i think the entire situation at the mosque just really surprised me and caught me off gaurd at that instance it was kind of frightening and a big shock to see a minivan just suddenly stop and have some one get out and block me in. i really think you are right there wasn't anything haram in it and you are right it's better to just dismiss it and shrug it off.

i hope she does get the peace she needs overseas and if she does come back she gets a fresh start on life with or without her husband.

Aminah