fulfill my haqq or grant me a talaaq |
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rookaiya
Senior Member Joined: 04 May 2005 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 385 |
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Posted: 20 December 2006 at 5:03am |
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asalamu alaikum i will suggest to hubby that we see our local imam in january next year. this thing has been going on for too long now. so many broken promises. hes promised me so many times that he will fulfil my haqq n he does for a while. once he gets pressure from his first wife, he then pulls back n starts neglecting me again, giving me one excuse after the next. i think an unbiased opinion form a learned scholar is exaclty what the 3 of us need to co exist under these circumstances. |
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niqab_ummi
Guest Group Joined: 08 December 2006 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 159 |
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Umm Abdelkhalek
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rookaiya
Senior Member Joined: 04 May 2005 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 385 |
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salaams NS just wanted to give u and others feedback here. this issue has now been resolved alhamdulilah. thanks for all the advise. Allah SWA indeed answered my prayers and im happy to say that my hubby is now fulfiling my haqq. its not easy as his first wife is not too thrilled about it, but thats the situation. hes spliting his time equally between us both. 2 days with her n 2 days with me. insha allah with time things will get easier especially for his first wife. |
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rookaiya
Senior Member Joined: 04 May 2005 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 385 |
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salaams NS great to hear from u. i will keep u posted and thanks for all the support u gave me during my darkest moments. may Allah reward u abundantly for that |
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najamsahar
Senior Member Joined: 21 June 2006 Location: Saudi Arabia Status: Offline Points: 151 |
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Dear Rookaiya Salamaleikum Sorry for the late response. I am in the US on our annual vacation and we are living in our own home. This means avoiding the cost and inconvenience of a hotel but I do not have a phone line to connect to the internet, just a cell phone. Also we did not subscribe to any cable or wireless service to avoid the costs, 1 USD means 4 riyals so everything is a bit tight. Anyways, nice to see that things are going well for you. From the last post, your goals seem to have changed. As long as this gives you peace, and you think this is the best choice for your kids and you, I wish you well and will keep praying for you. Lastly, lets keep in touch, it was great to hear how you are fighting your battles. Najamsahar. |
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rookaiya
Senior Member Joined: 04 May 2005 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 385 |
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salaams NS just to give u some feedback im now on day 7 of the 10 day thingy. Alhamdulillah this time is tuck to my guns and didnt cal or text hubby. instead on day 4 he called me to ask how i was doing on day 5 he came over unannounced and to his diappointment i wasnt home. he went crazy n called me on my mobile which was off. the next morning he was oustside my door at 4am knocking for me to let him in ive come to realise that i dont need to force anyone to do anything that they dont want to do. on my side ive done all i could and im now focusing on work, my studies and the kids. if he and i are meant to be together then it will happen by the will of Allah. i cant force it to happen it took me a long time to get to this place and i hope i can remain at this place n not go back to my old ways of trying to force things to happen. thanks everyone for all the moral support. and thanks NS for taking time to give me that step by step guide. i have made a copy for future reference, should i need it someday. ive also started a blog where i vent out about my feeelings and all the stuff ive been through. u can find it under this name http://frompolygamytosinglemom.blogspot.com
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rookaiya
Senior Member Joined: 04 May 2005 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 385 |
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salaams NS in case u and the others are wondering abt me and y im so quiet lately, well the answer is that im stuck in phase one. i have started and stopped this phase for a month now. i cant seem to see the 10 day thing through. the most i did at one time was 6 days. and that took a lot out of me im not giving up however. yesterday i started again and im on day 2 now. insha allah this time i will follow through. at the same time im busy preparing for my exams and i dont have much time to log on here once again thanks for the support and words of encouragement . i hope everyone here is well and that u guys all had a wonderful Eid salaams |
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najamsahar
Senior Member Joined: 21 June 2006 Location: Saudi Arabia Status: Offline Points: 151 |
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W'salaam Sorry I logged off after I posted the message. When I posted the message, it was around 12 Noon, Kingdom time. Longitudinally, Saudi Arabia and South Africa are not far apart I guess. we are three hours ahead of GMT. Sehri ends at 5 AM with the fajr salat. I am starting a new thread, maybe we can see how everyone else on the forum is spending their Ramadhan. NS Edited by najamsahar |
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