Ruined Marriage, Living with regret!

As-salamu alaykum 

I am in desperate need for your kind advice and guidence. I have been married for ten years with 3 wonderful children who I love and adore more then life its self. 

My marriage started off well but hit a you turn as I felt my wife my wouldn't listen to me or obey me. I felt like she would listen to her family more then me. At time I would make a decission and it would always be challenged. 

Later on I lost interest and my mind started to wonder I stopped praying and became distant from myself and went down the wrong path I became aggressive, load, started moving toward worldy things and destruction  i started to do haram things watching pornography, demanding my wife to do things out of her comfort zone gambling I was losing the will to live i still am not sure.why I went down this path. 

4 months ago my wife left me and move to her family in pakistan. Since then I have realised my mistake and have begged Allah swt for his forgiveness and mercy every day during my prays and after my prayers. Since this point  I have not done a single bad thing I have been getting mental health help and treatments on  regular bases. 

By comming back to Allah swt I have asked for forgiveness and guidence. That I know have come to realise my mistakes and I have left all the bad things behind me and have vowed to Allah swt I will never go back. 

I have been trying to reach out to my wife to convince her I changed and begged for her mercy to take me back and grant me one final chance to earn her respect trust and love back. 

She does not believe she should. I have read a lot of articles online stating if man shows.remose and is true to himself and Allah swt the wife should hear him out and give him a chance?. 

I am willing to do anything to get my wife and kids back i have had made a devotted promise to Allah SWT never to go back to treat my wife with love trust and respect. 

Should she give me a chance or divorce me as I really don't want her to. I am praying she gives me one chance to redeem myself? 

She will only take me back if a scholar will justify that she should?

Please I really need to know if there is any hope. I really want to fix my marriage I am depressed without my children and wife in my life i am living with a huge amount of regret. I want to make it right and make my family whole again Inshallah. I have several panic attacks and anxitey attacks because i really love my children and wife but i feel like i have lost them :( 

Jazakallah 

Ali