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MT786 View Drop Down
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Joined: 27 May 2018
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    Posted: 27 May 2018 at 1:04am
Assalaamhu Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakaatu brothers and sisters.Alhamdulillah all praise is due to Allah swt and peace and blessings to our Nabi Muhammad Sallalahu Alayhi Wassallam.

I am going through a tough time. I recently got married in january this year to the woman whom I fell in love with, we made nikkah, she accepted Islam last year as she is a revert. And has practiced a bit before we even got to know each other better. She has moved to my town last year already where my family and majority of her family lives, part of her family are christian. And in the time shes been here and even though we made nikkah and did everything Islamically, she had started drifting away from the teachings of islam and felt like it wasnt helping her, she started attending church services and programs with her christian family and in the few months we have been married, she swayed more n more to christianity to the point where she doesnt practice anything as a muslim. I thought i was giving her time n peace and love by letting her find her way spiritually, as i really do love her and she is an amazing person, and i figured shed come back to the fold of islam some day, shes never had a solid religious foundation before and thats why she was easily swayed, i know its my fault for giving in to her and not showing her how beautiful islam is and how Allah helps us...but now she no longer even worries about my side of things even though she used to say that she will respect my beliefs n not change me, but she wants me to convert as well...now we have so many arguments, even though ive been supporting her, she hasnt fully supported me, and the arguments n fights just got worse, now she wants divorce...her family n my family get along so well, they all love me as my family loves her, theyve all given so much n done so much for us all. And we for each other as a couple, i dont want to lose her, i still love her and have yaqeen that she will revert again. But its all becoming so much, what do I do? And it is the month of Ramadaan...ive made so many sacrifices of my beliefs for hers and her desires...i feel very broken.
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abuayisha View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote abuayisha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 May 2018 at 5:39am
Unfortunately, it's common that after a bitter disagreement, feeling are hurt, and calls for divorce are heard. Don't let it deter you from pressing patiently along. If she appears serious about divorce and persists in calling for it, try to have a brief separation period of a few months and then asset whether the marriage can continue. Just know the period of romantic love whereby people will do and say anything is over. All marriage have serious problems, moreover life is problematic, so trust in Allah, make plenty of dua, and be patient. Be kind and don't allow yourself to be baited into nasty disputes. Give gifts and don't shy away from apologizing. Do the things you were accustomed to do when wooing her. Allah bless you with good.
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Dr. Aslam View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Dr. Aslam Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 May 2018 at 12:53pm
Marriage is a very delicate process and  and in Islam the believers are given permission to marry women from people of the book with the assumption that as husbands they would accept and respect the religious identity of their spouse.
She explore the faith of Islam and it appears she is not yet convinced that it is the right faith for her. Be patient and respect her decision and keep on fulfilling your responsibilities as a husband.

Best Regards,
Aslam Abdullah
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Tim the plumber View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tim the plumber Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 May 2018 at 1:43am
How would you feel if she demanded you change your religion?

You will either have to respect the person and choice of your wife or be broken hearted.

Women are difficult and strong things. It's what makes them so special.
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