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I need some advice

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ahlam View Drop Down
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    Posted: 22 March 2006 at 4:20pm

Asalamu Alakum

I am 17 years old. Recently, my first cousin asked for me. He is a really nice guy. He was raised in Palestine, so he speaks arabic. But I am a little worried because I understand arabic very well but my speaking skills aren't that great. How will I know if we will be able to communicate? I don't know what to do. Please help.

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herjihad View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote herjihad Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 March 2006 at 5:32pm

Bismillah,

Are you ready to get married at all? Arabic speaking isn't the issue that's most important.  Language can be learned.  It's the difference in your cultures that may come between you.

Why don't you make plans to go to a community college.  Ask your counselor how to fill out financial aid forms, just in case you want to go in the fall.  The time to fill them out is now, you know.  And if you change your mind, then you don't have to accept the aid.  But if you haven't applied, then it won't be there for you if you change your mind and decide to take classes in August.

Give us more details to help you more, okay?

Peace. 

Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.
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Abeer23 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Abeer23 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 March 2006 at 10:02pm

Ahlam, I love your name; it's beautiful

Herjihad has given you great advise.  And about the language, don't worry too much about it.  If you're just not used to speaking Arabic, then you'll get used to it within a month.  Start now having your parents speak to you in Arabic only. 

Salaam

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ahlam View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ahlam Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 March 2006 at 7:09pm
Well, I do plan on going to college I will have 2 years done before I get married, if I do. And he said he would let me go to college and work-And he is a good guy. He is from a good family. But he is a grocery worker but that doesn't mean he is poor he lives in a $500,000 house. We are from the same culture so that is not the problem.My parents speak arabic all the time. I understand it very well but my speaking isnt so great. there is a lot of words i don't know how to say. And he doesn't know english very well. Thanks for your help
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salman View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote salman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 March 2006 at 4:08am
Originally posted by ahlam ahlam wrote:

Asalamu Alakum

I am 17 years old. Recently, my first cousin asked for me. He is a really nice guy. He was raised in Palestine, so he speaks arabic. But I am a little worried because I understand arabic very well but my speaking skills aren't that great. How will I know if we will be able to communicate? I don't know what to do. Please help.

walaikumussalam

recite the dua which prophet Moses (peace be upon him) made to Allah when Allah ordered prophet Moses (peace be upon him) to go to Fir'aun.

the verse is mentioned in the Quran.

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Angel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 March 2006 at 5:34am

Originally posted by ahlam ahlam wrote:

he lives in a $500,000 house.

WOW!

~ Our feet are earthbound, but our hearts and our minds have wings ~
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herjihad View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote herjihad Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 March 2006 at 8:30am

Bismillah,

Dear Sister Ahlam,

I am familiar with the type of situation you are in.  Well, your culture is different in that he was raised there and you here, you have a big difference in experiences "culturally".

Why don't you work on not only improving your spoken Arabic, but also get familiar with songs and music that he likes, that have special meaning to him, and vice-versa?  If you are friends with a Sister who is similar to him in terms of background, culture and language, she could help you understand many things you will need to know.

I'm just assuming that you can read and write Quran fluently, but maybe that is wrong of me.  Learning those would be essential for you as well if you don't know them.



Edited by herjihad
Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.
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ahlam View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ahlam Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 March 2006 at 1:05pm
well he has two sisters one knows a little english and the other doesn't know any. I speak to them both but my arabic isn't that great. I know a lot of quran and I can read and write it. I asked his sister about me not knowing english and she told me he asked if a knew arabic too. I am afraid we won't be able to talk to each other like we would if we both spoke the same language fluently. Should I say no to him?
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