Teenage marriage/engagement

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   I would like to ask a question and hope to have some quotes from Quran or Hadith from anyone who may have the answer.
I know of a young Muslim man who is almost 17 years old, and he knows a girl of same age since 4 years.  They speak with each other at school, and they both have developed strong feelings for each other.  The young man says it is not respectfull to continue speaking with her without a commitment, and wants to be engaged, and later married in about 3 or 4 years after finishing University.  they don't see each other after school, as the girl works after school, and on weekends.  The girl's family is not Muslim but they are from a country that has many muslims.  She knows about Islam, and might become Muslim someday as she likes Muslim culture, and beliefs.
My question is this:
Is proposing to be engaged the appropriate thing to do in this situation?  Is there any other choice, and what advice would you give for the young man and his family?

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IslamIsTheBest Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter Joined: 30 November 2005 Location: Canada Status: Offline Points: 3	Post Options Post Reply Quote IslamIsTheBest Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Topic: Teenage marriage/engagement Posted: 30 November 2005 at 6:08am
	I would like to ask a question and hope to have some quotes from Quran or Hadith from anyone who may have the answer. I know of a young Muslim man who is almost 17 years old, and he knows a girl of same age since 4 years. They speak with each other at school, and they both have developed strong feelings for each other. The young man says it is not respectfull to continue speaking with her without a commitment, and wants to be engaged, and later married in about 3 or 4 years after finishing University. they don't see each other after school, as the girl works after school, and on weekends. The girl's family is not Muslim but they are from a country that has many muslims. She knows about Islam, and might become Muslim someday as she likes Muslim culture, and beliefs. My question is this: Is proposing to be engaged the appropriate thing to do in this situation? Is there any other choice, and what advice would you give for the young man and his family?

Nausheen Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Moderator Group Female Joined: 10 January 2001 Status: Offline Points: 4251	Post Options Post Reply Quote Nausheen Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 15 December 2005 at 8:02am
	*Auzubillahi minash shaitan ir rajeem,* *Bismillah ir rahman ir rahim,* Assalamualaikum, A man can marry women from people of the book, ie the christians and the jews. If the young lady is a believing christian, or a believing jew, there is nothing wrong in proposing her at this stage. If she is one of the polytheists, then it would not be correct to propose, because a proposal to marriage is like a commitment - whereas he cannot fullfil any such commitment unless she accepts Islam. In such a case he should explain his intentions of marraige with an additional clause that make it clear to her the circumstances in which they can tie the knot. Maa salaama, Nausheen
	<font color=purple>Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.[/COLOR]