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Israfil View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Israfil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 November 2005 at 3:54pm

Wa alaikum Salaam,

Let me first say that it takes a lot of patience and understanding here on this website even though this is a website and none of us has seen each other just by the very fact that we can have a somewhat civil discussion is miraculous. What upsets me on this website is when people take my words out of context and use them for their own illogical assertions. Let me first address to Mishmish illogical assrtion.

Sister with all due respect let me say that what you posted about what I say in conjuction to us "brothers reflecting the very prejudices of our Ummah" is not only unwarranted but totally wrong. Mishmish if you asked sister Ummziba all of my post reflect the realism of society and how we as individuals, not as an Ummah must change it. Before we can change our social infrastructure we must individually change ourselves. I neevr said specifically that all cultures in Islam are against reverts I don't know where you got that crap from, because it is what it is crap!

It appears I can't be sympathetic to people here because I highly dislike it when people just brisk through  what I read and assert things that I totally did not say. Secondly Candor is obviously an ignorant Muslim hands down. I use the word ignorant because obviously for any Muslim to allocate a specific cultures qualities with those who revert to their primordial faith is obviously ignorant of the true spirituality of Islam. Most of those who respond here are absent of the ole philosophical subject: logic.

My whole point here was not to post some complaining on why this is this, and why that is that. My whole point here was to discuss the reality of our world and how ignorance parades through our community unknown. This subject has nothing to do with reverts and non-reverts. This has something to do with our own socialogical dysfunctions and how we should combat it. True we are all entitled to our opinion but what we must do prior to stating our opinions is "GET ALL THE FACTS" sister Mishmish disappointing that you overlooked all that I said and the only thing you can state about anything what I said was something totally different. Perhaps you are carrying over comments in the women's section. Actually I haven't even gone back to that subject because I chose not to continue the discussion perhaps you are carrying what you said to here I don't know just making an assertion like you did here.

Some of you may look at my age and say I haven't even known 1/3 of life yet but living in a country which of course was not by choice, you learn a few things. Living in Islam you obviously learn more things and practicing it, you learn a lot! On this subject here (which I like to bring everyone back to) its knwon here that racism is not the very top of our discussion. The only thing I can say I admire about the Nation of Islam is that it discusses racism on a real level. Although I don't agree with their inital philosophy on spirituality I agree that racism starts with human beings (of course they have their own brand where racism start but I only took what they implied).

Racism in culture starts with the individual and until we change the individual and our perspective on life only then we can notice any differences within our community. Sometimes it takes the "out of the box" approach by us to do that. Look at Rosa Parks. Not too many Muslims here give her her due but if we can take anything in our time from that individual we can say that she went above and beyond off one simple act. It took a woman, an African-American woman to say "no!" in defiance of the law to change history and that she did. Of course there are others to mention but point being here is that it starts with us.

We Muslims here complain about the war in Iraq, Iran, Syria and any country with a high Arab population but what about Sudan? Ethiopia? Malaysia? We have problems in other areas yet we focus on Arab states. We focus on Pakistan yet we dont focus on Muslim women being raped by Arab militas. Hmmm I see a pattern here. Not point figers at cultures but I'm saying that there is a pattern of where our priorities are as a community. We can talk about Bush all day long but the thing is until we equip ourselves with knowledge and of true Islamic principles only then we can acheive that enlightenment where our society changes. As for Candor and Muslims like him they will always win so long as we Muslims keep looking elsewhere......Yes I have a lot to say here because I'm sick of Muslims picking each other apart rather than supporting...I take this approach because I'm sick of people overlooking all what I say and only using parts of what I say. I write a lot so why dont you read!!!

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Mishmish View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mishmish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 November 2005 at 6:30pm

Originally posted by Israfil Israfil wrote:

 Now unfortunately centuries later there are still racial tensions in our community. In regards to choosing a mate a lot of cultures mostly Eastern and South asian culture tend to instill this cultural endogamy upon their children. If a daughter decides to marry a white man even if he shares the same faith I've seen that has become a problem. The question is why?

Brother, I don't think I said that you stated ALL cultures, but above is what you did state. Perhaps I am wrong, but this does seem to be pointing a finger at a specific group of people and claiming that they act in a specific manner. Is this not the very definition of prejudice? That they act a certain way, have certain mannerism, etc...I'm sure I don't need to go into any cliches.

You say that they are prejudice against certain groups because they are different in some manner, but by pointing out the specific groups as you have done,  you are doing exactly what you accuse them of doing.



Edited by Mishmish
It is only with the heart that one can see clearly, what is essential is invisible to the eye. (The Little Prince)
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Mishmish View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mishmish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 November 2005 at 6:41pm

Originally posted by Israfil Israfil wrote:

We Muslims here complain about the war in Iraq, Iran, Syria and any country with a high Arab population but what about Sudan? Ethiopia? Malaysia? We have problems in other areas yet we focus on Arab states. We focus on Pakistan yet we dont focus on Muslim women being raped by Arab militas. Hmmm I see a pattern here. Not point figers at cultures but I'm saying that there is a pattern of where our priorities are as a community. We can talk about Bush all day long but the thing is until we equip ourselves with knowledge and of true Islamic principles only then we can acheive that enlightenment where our society changes. As for Candor and Muslims like him they will always win so long as we Muslims keep looking elsewhere......Yes I have a lot to say here because I'm sick of Muslims picking each other apart rather than supporting...I take this approach because I'm sick of people overlooking all what I say and only using parts of what I say. I write a lot so why dont you read!!!

Assalamu Alaikum Brother:

I did read what you wrote. Have you read what you wrote? You say that you are sick of Muslims picking each other apart, yet you spent the entire paragraph doing just that.

I am not sure what the point of your posts are. You make very sweeping statements and generalisations, yet when someone questions these or answers you with a different opinion you become upset. Are you wanting someone to agree with you that there is prejudice? I agree, there is prejudice. But not everyone is prejudiced and not everyone has shared your experiences.

It is only with the heart that one can see clearly, what is essential is invisible to the eye. (The Little Prince)
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Israfil View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Israfil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 November 2005 at 9:37pm
Picking on whom? Be specific and how that is relevant to what we are discussing now...Also how does what I say contradict/refute anything I've spoken about in the past....How do I get offened when people question me I'd like specifics since you implied I don't read what I wrote....? Also please note how you have highlighted my words how I myself have picked on you or anyone else? You have also stated that in my last post I have noted that I haven't mentioned "all cultures in the Muslim community aren't prejudiced" but wasn't that my point in the first place? The whole point of what I meant was that it exist rather than say that it doesn't exist. Thus the point of dicussion here.

Edited by Israfil
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mishmish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 November 2005 at 3:34pm

Assalamu Alaikum Brother:

Let me clarify what I stated in a logical manner so that you might better understand what I meant.

1. You stated: "In regards to choosing a mate a lot of cultures mostly Eastern and South asian culture tend to instill this cultural endogamy upon their children."   In this statement you are specifically mentioning a group of people: Eastern and South Asian, and stating that they perform a specific task: instill this cultural endogamy upon their children. By choosing this specific group of people to make this statement about, you are in effect stereotyping Eastern and South Asians. Stereotyping by it's very nature is prejudicial: Muslims are terrorists, Arabs are oppressors of women, Eastern and South Asians are exclusive of other cultures... etc... thus my statement that you are doing the very thing about which you are complaining.

2. You stated: Yes I have a lot to say here because I'm sick of Muslims picking each other apart rather than supporting...  By picking each other apart the assumption is: they are harsh, they are judgemental, they point out each others shortcomings and faults, etc.... Yet, here is the content of the paragraph in which you wrote this statement:

We Muslims here complain about the war in Iraq, Iran, Syria and any country with a high Arab population but what about Sudan? Ethiopia? Malaysia? In this sentence you are inferring that Muslims do not care about countries where the population is not Arab.

We have problems in other areas yet we focus on Arab states. The same as above.

We focus on Pakistan yet we dont focus on Muslim women being raped by Arab militas. In this sentence you are inferring that Muslims find the problems of Pakistan of more importance than that of the Muslim women being raped, I am assuming in Sudan.

Hmmm I see a pattern here. The pattern being that Muslims care only for certain cultures within the Islamic Community?

Not point figers at cultures but I'm saying that there is a pattern of where our priorities are as a community. Here, by stating that you do not wish to point fingers at cultures you are doing just that, then infer that the priorities of the Community lie only within certain cultures.

We can talk about Bush all day long but the thing is until we equip ourselves with knowledge and of true Islamic principles only then we can acheive that enlightenment where our society changes. Here you are inferring that the Muslim Community in general is not knowledgeable of true Islamic principles, and spends time in idle talk. 

As for Candor and Muslims like him they will always win so long as we Muslims keep looking elsewhere..... Here you name a specific person and group of Muslims that somehow fall short of the Muslim ideal.

In each of these sentences you have pointed out a  shortcoming, fault, or been judgemental of your fellow Muslims. In fact, when you state you are: sick of Muslims picking each other apart rather than supporting...   you are pointing out another fault of Muslims. Isn't this pointing out of faults, shortcomings, and actually naming of fellow Muslims picking them apart? Something that you state you are sick of other Muslims doing?

3. In response to my earlier post where I stated: But Brothers, you talk about the injustice of the Ummah today and the prejudices within it, yet your posts reflect these very prejudices. Israfil with his notions that other cultures in Islam are against reverts, and Candor with his weak Westerners remark. Both show the very thing that they are complaining against., you wrote: "I neevr said specifically that all cultures in Islam are against reverts I don't know where you got that crap from, because it is what it is crap!"      The tone in which you responded in this sentence and the language you used causes me to assume that you were upset/unhappy/offended at what I wrote. this is why I wrote that you were upset because I posted a different opinion.

4. You wrote: "True we are all entitled to our opinion but what we must do prior to stating our opinions is "GET ALL THE FACTS" sister Mishmish disappointing that you overlooked all that I said and the only thing you can state about anything what I said was something totally different."   I believe I have all of the facts as I am in fact using the words that you yourself wrote, copying them directly from your posts.  I have not overlooked anything, nor am I referring to any other forum on which you might have posted, but rather what you have written here.

 

It is only with the heart that one can see clearly, what is essential is invisible to the eye. (The Little Prince)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Israfil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 November 2005 at 9:02pm

Sister funny you posted a comment I made in another forum here to justify some point you are making. I'd love to contradict and dissect your post ehrer but there really is no point derailing the discussion. However I'd like to point out one remark you used to justify a comment you made here:

You mentioned my point in the first paragraph above:

"In regards to choosing a mate a lot of cultures mostly Eastern and South asian culture tend to instill this cultural endogamy upon their children."   In this statement you are specifically mentioning a group of people: Eastern and South Asian, and stating that they perform a specific task: instill this cultural endogamy upon their children. By choosing this specific group of people to make this statement about, you are in effect stereotyping Eastern and South Asians. Stereotyping by it's very nature is prejudicial: Muslims are terrorists, Arabs are oppressors of women, Eastern and South Asians are exclusive of other cultures... etc... thus my statement that you are doing the very thing about which you are complaining.

Sister No offense but do you know what endogamy means?

It means to marryw ithin one's own tribal (or own group). This can pertain not only to tribes but cultures etc. Although you've mentioned this at the bottom of your paragraph I don't think you understood the true reasoning why I posted that. It's not a stereotype if it is fact. I can prove it to you. Most countries which do not have a diverse population let's say Saudi Arabia.

Most of the known inhabitants that are there who have married within their own tribal/cultural group for generations upon generations eventually develope an inherent cultural philosophy based on culture and family. If one immigrates to another country where the society is different and multicultural the individual however amazed to a multicultural society still retains that inherent cultural philosophy of endogamy which as you stated is "exclusive" most culture from that reason feel more comfortable being "with their own" because of share cultural traditions etc. This is a proven fact and not a stereotype because the same can be said by us who have been born of a multicultural society! We would be more open minded and tend to look beyond culture (however its not always evident in all people).

Again sister read my logic because its ell proven. Secondly when I attribute to the Muslim community I mentioned those individuals who still retain that cultural endogamous philosophy I find it a contradictory element to Islamic principles because how can one follow Islamic guidence if one believes in the philosophy of cultural exclusivism in regards to marriage and family? Thus the topic here! I dont think you'll get my point but all I ask for you is to contemplate and if you dont believe me travel abroad and do empirical research for yourself you'll know what I mean. Reverts have hard times marrying those of those countries (middle Eastern South/Asian) because the elements of those philosophies exist because that's all they know.

I'm sure some would say: "If that is the case how are they wrong?" They are wrong because they cannot mix an exclusive ideology with another ideology which is inclusive religiously and culturally which is Islam.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mishmish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 November 2005 at 3:43am

Assalamu Alaikum Brother:

Exclusive: Singled out in preference: choice, chosen, elect, select. See choice, include

Not diffused or dispersed: concentrated, intensive, undivided, unswerving, whole. See collect, edge, part

I think sometimes people see what they want to see. I live in an area of the US which has a very large Muslim population. I would say that 98% of the married Western reverts are married to Muslims from Middle Eastern/Asian/South Asian countries. All of the American women reverts that I personally know have husbands from these countries. All of them, and it does not matter what race or ethnicity these Sisters are. Most of the American male reverts have wives from these cultures. A large number of the African American brothers have actually gone overseas to Morocco, Algeria, Egypt, etc, and returned with wives.

There are multi-cultural marriages everywhere within the Muslim population, just look around. I would venture to say that most of the married Western reverts who post here are married to someone from the Middle East or Pakistan, Afghanistan, etc...

As for your assertion that I will not get the point of your topic, you are correct. Not in that I don't understand your posts, however philosophically deep you might believe them to be, but rather I do not get your reason for posting this topic at all if you feel that no one here will understand the point and you argue with anyone who doesn't agree with you. You keep repeating that what you are saying is proven fact, so what is the point? If it is a proven fact, then why even bring the subject up. A fact is a fact and continually bringing it up will not change it.

If you feel that this proven fact is at odds with Islamic principles, then why not go out amongst the Ummah and work to change what you see as a serious problem? In fact, Islamically that is your duty. If you see an injustice, you should speak out against it.

It is only with the heart that one can see clearly, what is essential is invisible to the eye. (The Little Prince)
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Israfil View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Israfil Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 November 2005 at 3:25pm

Mishmish you say 98% of the reverts in the States (in the section where you live) live in multi-cultural relationships. Great! But out of how many immigrants do the United States get per year? Hundreds of thousands (not singling one group but in groups of thousands) I would assume the 98% of the western rveerts that are in, interracial relationship is a fraction of a small population when you measure the grand Muslim community. That's not a very big population if you ask me perhaps its about %1 of the billion Muslims.

You ask that I repitiously say that this is proven fact and yes it is proven fact and I will keep saying this ere because this is a serious issue. You make it seem that because your community is diverse that there is no problem with race. I find that laughable. ecause United states doesn't practice slavery doesn't mean racism doesn't go on in the U.S because it does frequently.

My point being is that racism and the issue with the marriage/family unit is an issue that I find really important. Of course some here may not think so because so here from others countries don't experience it on grand scale as we do here in the U.S. By the way sister how do you know I haven't done anything already here with my MSA (Muslim Student Association) and haven't done any awareness programs? You may assume all you want there but I've done plenty on my end physically here with my uiversity, what have you done? I come here because not all here are aware that this is an issue.

Again let me remind you since the evolution of tribal warfare racism has existed long before Muhammad and long before prophets in the Qur'an with the exception of Adam. This is another issue in which we can repair within our social infrastructure. I find this to be a good discussion because marriage and family is the other half of our Iman so why do I bring it up here that's why? If you wish not to read repiritious post I suggest you keep yourself blind to this truth and not respond if that is what you wish. By the way how do I argue with someone who doesn't agree. There is nothing to argue here because frankly most thinking Muslims agree that racism is one of the social issues of our community.

You may bring up great examples of reverts and stuff who marry outside their culture but remember we live in the United States where pockets of immigrants have not choice but to acclimate to the American culture here. Some culture is bound to get mixed up with another culture. But again this is less than a percent of theMuslims in the world. Now let me say if those who you know who have marriage others from the Middle East I wonder if they would have the same luck going to Saudi Arabia or Pakistan or Bangladesh in hopes of finding a husband or wife in a deely rooted culture and tell meif they find the same results....

 

Sister FYI by your early post with your definition obviously you dont know what endogamy is...let me help you out (and this is with sincerity not being sarcastic here)

endogamy

One entry found for endogamy. < name=entry =/cgi-bin/dictionary method=post>
< = value=endogamy name=hdwd>< = value=endogamous name=listword>< = value=Dictionary name=book>
Main Entry: en�dog�a�my
Pronunciation: en-'d�-g&-mE
Function: noun
: marriage within a specific group as required by custom or law
- en�dog�a�mous /-m&s/ adjective



Edited by Israfil
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