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Infertility and Islam

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Suleyman View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Suleyman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 September 2005 at 10:27am

Originally posted by Angela Angela wrote:

Yes, it does.  With the numerous Tsunami Orphans, I would think giving the Indonesian Muslim children a muslim home would be best.  Not an american christian family.

We should also add New Orleans to the list...

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Lameese View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lameese Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 September 2005 at 11:24am
Originally posted by Angela Angela wrote:

I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome....very severe to years of misdiagnosis.  I need expensive medicines and treatments.  Unfortunately in most States and for most insurances, fertility is a luxury and not covered.  My husband and I are too poor to afford the medication, treatments and doctors visits.  So, we are looking into adoption instead.  Our church subsidizes adoptions and it is only 10% of your income to adopt with a minimum of $4000 dollars.  We are going to start the process sometime next year. 

My aunt was barren for most of her marriage, then suddenly at 38 yrs old, she had my cousin Lydia.  One child, that's all, but it was enough for her and my Uncle.  They love their little miracle, which she truly is.  They were not under a doctor's care when Lydia decided to join the family.  In that I will always hold hope.

Maybe I will earn a blessing from God through my actions.  I believe in the end we will be rewarded for our own deeds.  Only he knows why I am tested like this, and I'm sure he has a plan for me that is bigger than I can see now.

Thank you both for your encouraging words.

 

Have they started you on Glucophage? or the equivalent? You can get past insurance. The way to do that is tell them you have symptoms that are preventing you from doing you daily activities. Like pain in that area. The insurance company still need to treat the disease. It might affect your fertility but they need to do something about what is causing it.

Also, you might have to call the insurance co. and argue with them. For example, there is a test out there that men are given with their yearly exams. It is a blood test that detects cancer and the insurance co pays for this. The same test can be used to detect cancer in women but unless you know to call the insurance co and tell them you want it and tell your dr to test you for that it is not done not offered.

Lameese

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MayPB View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MayPB Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 September 2005 at 6:19am

Regarding adoption -- Adopting from third world countries (if you are in the west) should be researched from different perspectives, dont believe the information that seems to fulfill your desired outcome. I say this because there is a market of children created exclusively to be sold to adoption agencies helping families in the West.

Patience and understanding should be implemented in order to make the best decision which would please Allah. In the meantime, maybe you could spend more effort being nurturing to the people who are in your life now, like your husband.

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Angela View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angela Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 September 2005 at 9:58am

There are only two foreign countries my husband and I have decided to adopt from....China because of their one child law has many girls who because they are second children and girls have no rights and no future....and Russia, because of my own heritage....but more than likely the child will have been born here in America.  Foreign adoptions are more expensive in our situation and it would also add to the expense to get the visas to travel and pick up our child. 

We actually talked about it this weekend and we've decided to adopt a toddler....they say that once a child passes the age of two in the adoption system, they are more than likely not going to get adopted so we are going to try for a 3 or 4 year old.

To answer about Glucophage...yes, they had me on it for 3 1/2 years now and it hasn't helped at all....and I'm currently fighting with United Healtcare to classify my condition as a health problem.  My grandmother was 33 when she had her hysterectomy and my mother was 40, I'm trying to argue preventive medicine considering the history of cancer in the women of my family.  But, its a fight that gets very emotionally draining. 

Not to put things to bluntly, but I think its Satan's way of preventing faithful women from getting help and doing their duties.  

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ummziba View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ummziba Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 September 2005 at 1:35pm

Angela,

I would say to you that Allah tries all of His creatures in many various ways.  Your infertility is a trial.  No one can know the outcome, but, try to think of it as a way to show Allah your inner strength and conviction.  Never consider it the work of Satan, he has no power over us - only by persuasion, making us think wrong or twist our ways of looking at things - he can't physically prevent pregnancy.

Consider this trial as an opportunity, I think you are already starting to do that by considering adoption!  And, to adopt older children, instead of an infant, is a wonderful thing to do for those kids (who many consider unadoptable because of their age!).

Keep strong in your faith and pray.  You may never have a baby of your own, or, you may, only Allah knows the future.  Either way, consider the blessings of what you have, rather than the disappointments of what you don't, that would be more pleasing to Allah.

I do wish you the best and would urge you to not let your disappointment turn your thinking around.  Many blessings come disguised as trials in this life!

Peace, ummziba.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words...they break my soul ~
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Angela View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angela Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 September 2005 at 2:19pm

Oh, I don't think my infertility is Satan's work....no, I know that's my trial....my Jihad, as you Muslimah's would say.  No, I think beauracracy and heartless accountants at medical facilities and the general giving everything a monetary value is how the Advisary does his work.  It is not always your heart he has to tempt to cause you misery.  But, you're right.  I need to keep my spirits up and remember to pray and be happy in the things I do have. God willing, one day I will have a baby of my own and maybe several others that I've taken as my own.  then I can have the joy of pulling my hair out when they become teenagers.  

Thanks,

Angie

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