discussion of cultural differences

Assalamu alaikum,

Perhaps my view is biased from living in a country full of marriages that involve "different" people - different cultures, religions, ethnic backgrounds, nationalities, even political views...

Of course the divorce rate is terribly high here, but, the marriages that do last still involve many people of differences.  So, I don't think it is the differences that decide a good marriage - it is the similarities.

It is extremely important for two people comtemplating marriage to thoroughly discuss important issues that will affect their marriage - religion, cultural differences, how to raise the kids, how to handle the money, who does what job, and so forth.  If these things are not worked out before marriage, big trouble can follow.

As well, we need to keep in mind that any marriage is a "work in progress".  The couple must constantly compromise, help each other, discuss matters, be kind to one another, keep up their end of the marriage agreement, and so on.  Really, open lines of communication between husband and wife are vital.

If two people agree to marry (whether out of love, convenience, for religious reasons, or what ever), they must remain committed to making the marriage work through all difficulties - and there are always difficulties, even in a really good marriage.

So, cultural differences (or any other differences), should make no real impact on the success of the marriage if the couple are willing to work together to make their marriage good.  If any differences do make the marriage "fall apart", I would say the couple did not know enough about each other before they married - and that would be their own fault - not the fault of the differences themselves!

All good marriages involve self-sacrifice, compromise, humility and acquiescence.  There is no room for selfishness.  Marriage should be able to work between any man and woman willing to work hard together to make it so.  There is no differences that can hinder this.

Peace, ummziba.