Abuse of religion

I have been talking with my good friend Sal here ;-)

He used an expression this morning - "abuse of religion".

I had been thinking, when out working this morning, what it is that is making me so intensely angry. And as much as I have seen, and tried, try to help others who have been abused by religion. Maybe I need to look at this for myself. If that is OK with you here.  It does NOT mean that religion IS abusive. It's the ab use of religion generally - how it can very deeply traumatise individuals. What should be life to them, brings only death.

Another person talked to me about 'God blaming'. I have asked him where I have EVER suggested that I blame God about anything. I never have in my life, and still do not. I have and do 'blame' 'religion' however - and for me, God is most certainly NOT religion. Religion, the real and true and proper practice of it, should be a means of moving towards God. It should bring life, not death.

I suffered very greatly because of an abuse of religion, and then being abused by a man whom we were taught represented 'God' - spoke on God's behalf. The 'clerics'. I have touched on this before.

It happens in all religions - abuse of people, of religion - through/by the clerics, those in power. And Islam suffers this too. Where you have power, especially 'spiritual' power - you have the potential for the worst kinds of abuse of individuals and societies.

Perhaps it does get back to that teaching a child how to love his/her self. How do any of us do this. 

It seems to me that any thing that robs the innocence from a child - and I am not only speaking of sexual abuse here, but ANY thing - that takes them from 'Eden' - is a kind of 'abuse' - 'sin'ful - robbing them of some innate sense of the spiritual, perhaps. The 'spiritual' person is an integrated one - whole some, wholly, holy. When that spiritual essence is undermined, contaminated - dis integration is the outcome.

I left the 'practice' of my religion, one that I had loved deeply as a child, for many years. In last six years or so I began to look to examining it all again - Christianity in general. I spoke to Christians of all 'denominations'.

I missed the sense of community, belonging. Though I had wandered on my own for a lot of years, I never ever stopped believing in God. 'Belief' is not even an adequate word. For me, God is, and that's it. It's like a 'know'ing more than 'believ'ing. How do I know ? I don't know. It's a heart thing - deep in my own soul. God is. I believed and believe that to love God is to serve, worship God, through the service of others. The love of others - learning to do this, as best we can. We learn of ourselves in this, of others, and the more we learn - the more we learn about God it seems to me. It is very much about relationship.

It was nice to talk again to Christians, and there were many arguments. Bit like here :-) I then tried again to get back to Catholicism. I had to go up against the almighty hierarchy. Bit like standing before all those awful shar'ia judges I am sure, when you've stepped on someone else's big toe and know you are gonna get shot for it ;-) I expected to be heard, listened to, have support and welcomed back with open arms. The lost sheep. The Prodigal returning. But it was not like that. There was a 'reputation' of a place, people, hierarchy, 'Church' to consider, and what I had to tell could stain that immaculate facade. So they tried to shut me up, brutalised me again to such a degree that I was left for dead in a street.

But still I tried, and I tried, to bang on those doors and ask them to listen to what I wanted to tell them. Not to judge or condemn, but to learn. To tell them what they were doing wrong, how they were hurting, killing innocent souls, and that none of it was necessary. Talking to a brick wall for the most part. You were patted on the back and given platitudes. But still, I KNEW there was soooo much good there - the stuff I had known and loved in my childhood and youth, that stuff I had begun to rediscover.

It was like 'they' had their hands on it, wanting to keep it all to themselves, and the only way we could have access to it, the laiety, was in bending to their will, which you are taught is tantamount to the 'will of God'.

Just one endless cycle of spiritual abuse. "Why seek the living amongst the dead......  you won't find it there........  " he said.

So I have that baggage I guess. And I am beginning to see and understand that this has much to do with why I 'go off on one' here too at times.

Maybe I expected Islam would be different. Maybe it is. I don't know yet. I am really just thinking now it is a different version of the same thing.

I saw something being asked about this before. Early religious experience and its negative impact on the individual - that he/she equates 'God' with the abusive elements of the religion and may then abandon 'God' too.  It is very prevalent - far more than realised I am sure, or perhaps even seriously investigated.

How do they get past this ?

It's not enough to give platitudes folks, pats on the back, and 'it's God's will' etc etc. They only add salt to a deep wound. Abuse is never God's will and platitudes only re abuse and re traumatise.

Not just sexual abuse - but an abuse of ANY kind, of any soul, and that abuse then being blamed on the Good God, not by the 'victim' - but the 'abuser'.

Anyone got thoughts, feelings, reflections on spiritual abuse - the trauma of it, and how it can be overcome.

I am NOT asking help for me here. I am just thinking about this issue, on reflection over last few days ramblings, and raising it as a possible discussion. One that might help people and one we might all learn from.

Sal, will you go and do what men were created to do - make the tea and sandwiches.  We'll start at 3pm GMT. ;-)

� and 'it's God's will' etc etc. They only add salt to a deep wound. Abuse is never God's will and platitudes only re abuse and re traumatise�

 

I am sorry friend but it is God�s will:

 

[2.30] PICKTHAL: And when thy Lord said unto the angels: Lo! I am about to place a viceroy in the earth, they said: Wilt thou place therein one who will do harm therein and will shed blood, while we, we hymn Thy praise and sanctify Thee? He said: Surely I know that which ye know not.

 

The question is will you still love him knowing this fact and will you submit to His will�

 

That is what Islam is� Knowing that He exists... knowing that He sent us here�and knowing that He allows evil to exist in this world for purposes that we do not understand � Yet we accept on faith that He knows what we do not know� And there is a purpose to this world�

 

He will throw �Haq�/Truth at the �Batil�/Falshood so that it would be destroyed� We the Muslims choose to be the hard edge of this Haq� But, we are bone and flesh and we will suffer�

I think too Aka,  need to be a little careful taking my statement completely out of context there. What I was actually saying, intending in my post. It was not a philosophical debate, theological point. I was talking about real, specific events - suffering that could, can most definitely be alleviated, if not avoided altogether. Sorry if that was too vague.  The avoidance of that kind of 'suffering' which would be God's will I have no doubts whatsoever. It could be avoided precisely because something was learned previously.

Am rushed here. Back later. 

AKA - WHY DO WE SUFFER ???  I want to know and I want to know NOW !! ;-) lol

God bless

Gulliver said:   It was not a philosophical debate, theological point. I was talking about real, specific events - suffering that could, can most definitely be alleviated, if not avoided altogether.

Bro G,
I thought (since this is an issue close to your heart right now) I thought I would forward this to you -

It is also the people's responses to the article that made me think to send it to you....

Depending on where you live in Ireland, maybe you could make a trip to see some of these people...   and maybe ease their suffering a bit....

http://www.irishhealth.com/article.html?level=4&id=7787

Violence against women in Ireland

By Deborah Condon

Violence against women and girls is a human rights and public health emergency worldwide, according to the World Health Organisation. It causes mental and physical injury, exposes women and girls to diseases and forced pregnancy, increases women�s vulnerability in all spheres of their lives and in the worst cases, ends in death.

But what about the situation in Ireland? According to a recent report from Amnesty International, violence against women in this country is widespread. Furthermore the government is not doing enough to identify, combat and redress this 'grave and systematic human rights abuse'.

This is a serious accusation, but unfortunately the facts are there to back it up. Continuing research has shown that violence against women is prevalent here, yet despite task forces, report and committees, the government has done little to actually help the victims of abuse.



The facts about levels of violence here are startling:

-The Sexual Abuse and Violence in Ireland (SAVI) Report (2002) found that one in four women had experienced some form of sexual abuse in their lifetime and one in five had experienced sexual assault as adults.

-In 2003, the Women's Aid helpline answered almost 13,000 calls. One in three of these related to physical violence, 13% to sexual abuse.

-Between January 1996 and the end of June 2005, 109 women were murdered in Ireland, 72 of these in their own homes. In those cases which have been resolved (up to the end of June 2005), all were perpetrated by a man and almost half were perpetrated by the woman's partner or ex-partner.

-A survey conducted by Dublin's Rotunda Maternity Hospital in 2000, found that in a sample of 400 pregnant women, one in eight had experienced abuse at the hands of their partner while pregnant.*

-A survey of women attending GP surgeries in 2002 found that two in five women who had been involved in a sexual relationship with a man, had experienced violence. This violence ranged from being punched in the face to being choked.

As shocking as these figures are, it is widely accepted that they probably under-represent the true extent of the problem. This is due to significant under-reporting of violence by women. A study by Women's Aid in the mid-1990s found that only one in five women who experienced domestic violence in Ireland ever contacted the Gardai.

"While stigma and shame are still unfortunately an issue, low reporting is also due to women's lack of confidence in the justice system", explained Sean Love, director of Amnesty's Irish section.



According to the Amnesty report, most reports of violence against women do not result in a conviction and there is little monitoring of the effectiveness of legal and other measures to prevent, identify, investigate and punish this violence.

It highlights the fact that the conviction rate for domestic violence has dropped from 16% in 1997 to 6.5% in 2002, despite the introduction of the 1996 Domestic Violence Act. Furthermore the Gardai's Domestic Violence Intervention policy has not been reviewed and women experiencing domestic violence, rape and sexual assault 'report inconsistent responses' from Gardai.

Meanwhile family law courts are overstretched and victims of domestic violence can experience long delays in accessing the courts for protective orders, such as a barring order. Where these orders are obtained, they are 'not vigorously enforced'.

"The extent to which men are charged with appropriate criminal offences for acts of violence in the family is unknown, but it is believed that they are often charged with least serious offences, such as breaching a barring order", the report said.

It notes that the effectiveness of the justice system and its sensitivity towards women experiencing violence has not been the subject of any official government review to date.

So what has the government done? Well way back in 1997, it published the Report of the Task Force on Violence Against Women. This contained comprehensive proposals for a coordinated, coherent and integrated response to violence against women. This, the task force said, should be done through the development of services and preventative strategies and the improvement of legislation and law enforcement.

However two crucial components of the report were never implemented - a national strategy on violence against women and 'monitoring and evaluating systems' for the planning and delivery of the measures it proposes.

Also in 1997, a National Steering Committee on Violence Against Women was established to implement the task force's report. However according to Amnesty, this committee 'has not been enabled to adequately fulfil any of its original nine functions'.



Amnesty also notes that funding for frontline services, which offer essential support to victims, remains fixed at the 2003 allocation. This means that despite more people attempting to avail of these services, funding has not increased in two years.

"What Amnesty highlights in its report is pervasive and avoidable** state failure to protect women from serious violations of their human rights", Mr Love said.

However Amnesty also emphasises the role Irish society should be playing in tackling this issue.

"We, Irish society, have both the power and the responsibility to finally end this abuse. Individuals are crucial to the eradication of this human rights violation. Violence against women is not a private matter - it is everyone's business."

The Amnesty report, Justice and Accountability: Stop Violence Against Women, was published in June, 2005.



* that one was the most gruesome to me.

** this quote probably made me think about your post as well "real, specific events..etc"

Edited by Jamal Morelli - 01 April 2009 at 6:58pm