My mother won’t look at me in hijab

Perhaps instead of getting your mum to read the Q'ran, you should get some statistics on the racial and cultural populations that exist in the USA. That way you can prove to your mother that the "culture" of the USA is actually freedom and diversity.

Ask your mother if she would treat other Muslims as badly as she treats you. If she says "no", then ask her why she treats you with such disrespect. One assumes she bought you up to think for yourself, and now she's abusing you for it. Not Nice.

Kim...

Salam to J.R.,

I will keep my comments short, since you asked for advice from sisters (which I can't give you, not being one.)

In my experience (my mother and sister are the two female re-verts from our family, and had similar difficulties when they put on hijab), it does get easier over time. I would say (from what I observed) that ummziba is right when she says that overtime they will accept (if still not like) your wearing hijab if you remain firm.

May Allah (s.w.a.) give you his strongest support for remaining steadfast on his path.

Salam.

Assalamu Alaikum,

To Ummziba, yes, I have heard of this book before and have been told
to get my hands on it. I'm wondeirng how my mom would react to me
sending it to her but I feel it would at least be good for me to read it for
myself then try to pass it along to her gently. I feel it would help her
understand what I'm going through yet I feel she doesn't even want to
understand. She's loving but extremely stubborn on any arguement that I
remember since I was a kid. But you have all given me further strength in
my hijab decision and thank you all so much.
I also thought about finding some great articles online about Islam
written for non-Muslims and mailing them home with a little note. Thank
God the internet is full of great info like that. Even if she tears it up and
throws it away (which she may do) at least I'd be trying and maybe I'd
keep sending them home until she reads it. Although that idea could
make things worse, I'm not sure. Since she won't listen to me on the
phone or in person, maybe she'd read something I send her. Maybe I
need to give her a little more time before I send her that book or any
articles. I'll keep praying to Allah (swt) for guidance.
Thank you, brother Ali Zaki for popping in here as well and sharing your
experience with us. It all helps.

Allah hafiz,
J.R.

Assalmau alaikum J.R.,

I am so sorry to hear your family is "cutting you off".  This is really their loss, not yours, dear.  Please keep in mind first and formost that the life of this world is a prison for the believers.  We will go through many, many trials, some which seem to break our hearts beyond mending.

I know, I have been through so much since becoming a Muslim.  For a time, I was so shattered and broken I could barely function.  Through sincere prayer and striving to please Allah, I came through that horrible time.  Looking back, I can't believe I survived with even some semblance of a mind left at all.

I am no longer the person I was.  I am better than that, by the Grace of Allah,  And you will be too, dear, just remain firm in your belief, pray sincerely and strive hard to please Allah.

I know from first hand experience how your heart must be breaking.  Allah is above all things, above parents, above family ties, above feelings of belonging, above heartbreak and tears.  Strive towards Allah and you will come through this.

Perhaps, some day, your family will decide they would rather have you in their life as a Muslim rather than not have you in their life at all.  But, prepare yourself for the fact that they may cut you off permanently.  Don't let your heartbreak turn you away from the path.

Know that it may take years for your heart to mend, but it will mend, by the Grace of Allah.  After all the hardship I went through, I am now enjoying much ease, alhamdulillah, and so will you,  It may seem bleak now and your heartbreak may seem insurmountable - but hold fast to the rope of Allah, keep your faith, and in sha'allah, in time, you will be calm and full of strength.

Try to keep in touch with your family.  Send cards or letters.  Try talking by phone, but, if they start yelling, hang up - you don't need to take that abuse from them.  If they never acknowledge your cards or letters, so be it, at least in the eyes of Allah you will not have broken the ties of kinship.

I will pray for you.  Don't despair, keep firm in your faith. 

Peace, ummziba.