I have often felt dejected at the way the foreign media projects the status of women under the banner of Islam. Whereas Islam enjoins perfect equality between men and women, it is heralded to the world as a faith that suppresses women, confines them within the four walls of their homes and alternately, looks down upon those who set foot outside the custody of the house. I have however, stumbled upon the fact that neither the foreign media nor the non-Muslims are to be blamed. It is really a matter for men who profess to be Muslims to look beneath their skin, into their blood with which they asphyxiate the breath of Islam and choke the life out of it - in effect, portraying it as a cruel faith.
Men of one faith will understand the other faith vis-a-vis the way it is practically witnessed by them because not all will delve into original sources with utmost devotion in order to realize the true spirit of the other.
Consider the following illustration.
Being alien to the religion of Islam, I walk into the village of Jubala - an underdeveloped and non-education oriented region. I am told that the natives there follow the religion of Islam. I shall easily be led into interpreting Islam as defined by the ancient customs of tribes inhabiting the region.
Consider another illustration.
Being somewhat alien to the religion of Islam, I walk into the city of Zameersi - relatively a developed and education-oriented region. I am told that a vast majority of the area's residents are Muslims. I, thus, understand Islam in the spirit of activity of the locals. I have been briefed. According to which, Islam is a tolerant faith. It grants equal status to men and women and it enjoins peace. But...
Alas! My observance runs averse to all pre-conceived notions. Islam does not enjoin the treatment of women in perfect likeness to men. Quite on the contrary, in fact. My discovery owes itself to a chance affiliation with a local family. The man sets out to work. The lady of the house stays at home. She is not supposed to be involved in any intellectual exhibition since that is not an option on her side of the 'equation'. Rather, she is supposed to stay at home, cook and keep the house clean. It takes an hour or two. Then what? Can she move out for - if nothing else - air? Not at all. Her religion requires her to stay inside her house and wait for the hard-working, deserving individual to return. Eleven hours in the office and he has earned the day's worth. It would only be fair if he were allowed a couple of hours to chill around with friends. Ten would be a good time to get back home. Dinner would be ready by then. Surely, its on the table. In the follow-up - and being human - it is only understandable that he gets a bit drowsy. The wife must not ask for any simple talk time, for Islam enjoins on the woman to allow her husband to relax since he is obviously providing her with food, clothes and shelter. She need not and should not demand more. He does his share of the work and goes to bed. She does her share of the work and must go to bed to rise again early morning and prepare breakfast for hubby dear. For surely, he has a tough day ahead of him. The weekend finally approaches and she welcomes it with open arms. A tough week, full of chores at home and zero interaction leaves her exhausted. But then, he deserves rest too. It would be a better option for her not to get used to the bed linen and get a wonderful breakfast-in-bed prepared for her man who obviously, deserves getting used to the linen. She feels tired and short of sleep but she must wear the best smile to please him. He has obviously been laboring throughout the week for her sake. He approaches her to acquire the one pleasure he must obtain. She can not decline because her religion forbids her to. She must understand her. He doesn't need to . . . end of story.
And then we raise our voices arguing about how dare they defame Islam?
The mentality of superiority that prevails among men of our societies is a shameful incidence. Professing to be Muslims and wanting our women to be protected from the predatory eyes of other men is good, and we must not be apologetic about it. But suppressing her under the man's nauseating demands, depriving her of education, stealing her right to feel and to express and giving her the sole symbol of being the answer to man's lascivious desires is not good - least of all, something to be proud of.
The Believers, men and women, are protectors one of another: they enjoin what is just, and forbid what is evil: they observe regular prayers, practice regular charity, and obey God and His Messenger. On them will God pour His mercy: for God is Exalted in power, Wise (Quran 9:71 )
Saadia Malik is a writer for Renaissance, Islamic Monthly Journal, Pakistan
Muslims bristle at any suggestion that there are any problems within an islamic framework. From the 911 terrorists weren't muslim, to a denial of slavery in the Sudan, to a denial of any but happy protected sheltered women in muslim lands...
I would suggest that the increased negativity in the American public towards Islam is *not* because of ignorance. Many have sought out knowledge, the web in particular, and what we've seen and heard *from muslim websites and out of the mouths of muslims* is how we've discovered that Islam (at least fundie style) is joyless, devoid of music, laughter, painting, TV, sports (women only), even children's toys, and certainly freedom, esp for adult women who are eternal minors,totally dependent upon the largess of their male guardians beit even their sons for every aspect of freedoms we take for granted in the West.
I want to say that I have found your letter quite a lot influenced by western modernism. Here we can see two scenarios where women are suppressed (traditional point of view) and where women are equal (modern point of view). I think both are incorrect. The modern approach is not sourced by Islam, just as the traditional one isn't. Yes, Quran tells us that men are superior to women. (Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband's absence what Allh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women on whose part you see illconduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allh is Ever Most High, Most Great.) [An-Nisa-37]Here, if we are not blindfolded with the prejudices of western civilization, we can see that it is Allah, who says men are superior. Quran also accepts that two women's witnessing is equal to one man's. Is this gender discrimination? To be honest, yes it is. But that is true if Allah does so, not because we, men like it, because he is the one who knows us best. If we take our eyes away from the prejudices of Western modernism and look at women and even ask them about this issue, we will see that Allah has given everybody the position complying with their own character and nature. I think we should not try to acquit ourselves before the prejudices of western modernism and ignore how Allah introduces women to us. On the other hand, neither should we ignore the orders of Allah preventing us from any kind of suppression.
Thank you for your giving the chance to express myself.
I find it hard to juggle children, work and then come home and try to juggle everything that goes on, in the home. ie: cooking, cleaning, laundry (never ending), school work, etc....
I think that if more men asked the women in their lives, they would agree with me. Many women want to stay home but are unable to because of the financial responsiblity that is also thrown, on them to.
I am thankfull that I have the ability to take my daughter to a gym class, stay to play with her and watch her, as she delights in her accomplishments. I am thankfull that I can stop by my sons schools, who are teenagers and still be involved in their lives.
but may i ask are you some islamic scholar who interperates the Quran if so i am sorry but you are doing a very lousy job
there are many ways in interperating the Quran
Islam does not forbid a women to step outside
a women is allowed to vote
a women is allowed to be educated
a women has all the rights a man has but only a few are limited
i say in america women had to fight to get thier right to vote while in Islam the right was alreday there.
The highest majority of people convering to Islam are women becuase islam offers more rights than any other religion.
take some other religion for example thier rights really aren't stated and then so how can you interperate how they should be put into practice
i say what garbage is this
if you think this is right i say get your priorities checked
or get some new conections on this subject
to read is one thing
but to interperat or understand is another
What makes this article particularly nauseating is its indiscriminate
use of male stereotypes. I do not accept that the dignity of men (even with regard to their wives) has so hopelessly dwindled. Admittedly there are problems, but I would hope that our approach to discussing solutions would extend beyond an adolescent viewpoint. Two words to the author: grow up.
After going through the article which was sent to me by a friend i think i really agree with the title "men choking the faith".
The reason being that though i know that the primary duty of the woman is in her home but i also know that islam does not deny her the opportunity of doing other things like working as long as it does not affect her primary assignment adversely.
Moreover, in the increasingly secular world we are in muslims need women to take up certain professions like medicine,education in order to help the ummah or do we expect that male doctors will continue to treat our women? It is clearly compulsory on the ummah to train and educate the women or how else is she supposed to raise her children? What you don't have, you can't give says an arab poet. I think that in summary shows the importance of educating women.
As well women should not not under the guise of seeking education or jobs neglect their duties in the homes as mothers , wives or daughters. In my own view the downward slide in the morality of the people is an indication of the failure of the the family.
May Allah guide us all aright.
Wassalam alaykum w/w.
Trust me what u have penned is just the tip of an iceberg!! The treatment to women by muslim men is worse. I reside in Aligarh in a locality inhabited by educated muslims. mong the neighbours-one on left is a phd and enjoyed beating his wife, see him always indulging in Dhikr and nawafil, next to him is a professor in Geography department who beats his wife ( beautiful one) to pulp every now and then, third to our right is very recently deprived of the pleasure of beating as the man succumbed to cancer, sixty degrees to us is another brute( young man ) who beats his wife, I know an IAS officer in calcutta who prohibits his wife's visit to he parents. One word that describes men's attitude is SICK.
Thank you and congratulations for a wonderfully written piece. Every sentence stike a chord in my mind. We need more of this kind of writing around. May Allah bless you.
I would just like to appreciate because of sending email and informing me about Islam and the believers of Allah.
with best wishes
A peaceful house with a firm loving atmosphere is very important in Islamic point of view. Also it desirable for a husband to be in house after his job than wandering here & there or opting a club life.
We may have lots of problems created by not following Islam, that need to be rectified, but if we take American life as a standard and compare ourselves then surely we will commit mistakes. The society is a center of all kinds of anti human anti social acvities, their own thinkers are warning them of worst consiquences and very shortly we will have most of the common people criticising and hating their life system, any civilisation will take some time to demolish under their own weight. 100/200 years is a short time for civilisations.
Anyway it is high time for Muslims to invite all the people of the wold to Islam, we have to be well wishers of all the humanity as we belong to Adam and it is our prime duty. Our struggle should be based on salvation in the hereafter, if it is achieved with (better/worstly) worldly life then we are succesful, if a sucees in hereafter is lost means eveything is lost. Let Allah guide us righteous way of life, Ameen.
Afifa it is a good thing you are in America, for if you were in Saudi you would not be allowed to drive a car. If you were in some parts of Yemen and Afganistan you would not only have to work but have to give your earnings to your husband. If you were in some parts of Pakistan and India you would have to marry who ever your family(male memebers) selected and if you did not you could be killed as an honor killing. If you were in some parts of Africa you would suffer genital mutilation. Or you would need four witnesses to prove rape. Let's face it in someplaces women in Islam are looked upon as second class. Just look at the comments of those men who think that women are not as smart as men. This is the same stupid argument put forward by whites in this country about Blacks. No where does Allah say women are not as smart as men! And men are given a measure of superiorty only because they provide for their spouses and their strength is given to protect not to enslave. It is time we wake up and realise and admit that we Muslims are not practicing as we should for if we were, 2/3s of the worlds refugees would not be Muslim. We would not have Muslims killing other Muslims just because they are from a different country. Palistine where once lived 6 million Muslims and 60,000 Jews would not now be in the hands of the Jews. We would not people killing innocents in the name of Islam with car bombs,nor would we be trying to establish Islamic states with terror. There would not be US bases in Qatar,Jordan,and Saudi about to be used on a Muslim no matter how despicable he is instead Muslims would have handled the problem themselfs. Muslim women during the time of the Prophet were wives,mothers,warriors,religous scholars,teachers. Again I ask you brothers would you rather have your wife attended by a male doctor or a believing woman. Islam was spread by the good behaviour of its followers.Let us stop dening our mistakes and correct them
so true! this is how our society is..hmm! majority
InshAllah this wont happen in my house n my muslim brothers too.. May Allah guide us!
i had no idea that some Muslim women in America are treated that awfully. I have never seen it myself because in our masjid, the men and women stay in seperate rooms during prayers etc. Most of the time in our community married couples rarely interact in public and if they do, nothing bad happens between them.
Inshallah, men will realize women have feelings and are HUMAN BEINGS and are actually MORE considerate than men. Women, if anything should be the higher sex. (not that im saying they are but if it should be one is higher, why the men?)
I do hope in the future these horrible sexist men will be nicer to their wives who do so much for them.
Or to be used as sex sample on hardwere tractor.
You are right about men should change thier hapets,and if every one of us follow the way of the prophetlife and the way he treat his wives.
Its unfortunate that some have used Islam as a veiled excuse for misogyny. No where can you find authentic direction that makes women "less then" full participants in all phases of life.
Men who would treat women as chattel and slaves, and those who fear that sisters in the workplace and community will weaken Islam and their deen, need only see the women of the Companions time to see women alive, strong and contributing, both at home and in community.
As a educated professional American revert, I see no inconsistency with being an outspoken, articulate professional who leads organizations, and issues and the role I have as a Muslim woman.
All who know me have come to see my colorful hijabs and my modest dress together with my laughter,intelligence, and compassion as a true model of Islam. Inshaa allah I encourage dialogue and dispel fear of "those" people...since I am both an educator and one of "those" people.
Wome are half our community and more than half the world. It's we who shape our communities and homes. I, for one, will continue to be a "good" Muslim woman, both in my private life and public image. I will continue to work for the right and appropriate of active, involved sisters..
.....And Allah Knows best
And what are we to do? Change the speech of Allaah and His Rasool, saw? Are we to change that which Allaah has ordained so you the women can do what? Go out in our stead and provide?
To be molested and assaulted by the mores of this society?
It is not enough that you are provided for?
Is it not enough of love what Allaah and His Messenger has decreed for the man and the woman?
What do you want from us? Now you want to take off the hijab, put on makeup, wear perfume? Your place is in the home and not in the market. You are allowed to get an education, to increase your knowledge of Islaam to benefit yourself in this life and the next.
Yet it is not enough. Your equality will destroy the home, the family and society. Do you think the world is cookies and milk for the muslim man whom tries to fear Allaah and obey His Rasool?
Many modernists want to change the deen of Allaah.
The men cut their beards, are not attached to the Masjid. The women have discarded the hijab and now want to compete with the kuffar for the love of the dunya. All you intellectualism will not change the reality of the destruction of the Islaamic family and home. We need our wives to love Allaah and His Sunnah, and the Sunnah of His Messenger, more than they love the glitter of this life.
No, they are not cattle to be pinned up during the day and let out to feed at night. I have seen the equality you speak of. And I must ask is their success in this dunya or their desire to obtain what Allaah has given to the man will draw them closer to the fire or closer to jennah?
I love staying at home and making my home beautiful, taking care of my family!! The only example I want my husband to follow is the Prophets peace be upon him.
3:186-............. and you shall hear much that will grieve you from those who received the scriptures before you and from those who ascribe partners to Allah.........
These days we seem to bother much about what the westerns are saying and how to react to that. It's like soul searching. Too bad, we forgot that we are blessed with the greatest and the final revealation made to the mankind- the Qur'aan. This is where our guidance is.
I don't agree with the author that Muslim men treat their wives as a lesser creation. Islam never taught us that. If someone thinks of women as a lesser creation this would be corruption of our mind by the western beliefs.
Who says homemaking is not a dignified work. We tend to think that by keeping our wives as homemakers we are relegating them to something inferior. We didn't learn it from Qur'aan.The western society taught us so.
We don't boast of the fact even in the western world Muslim children are not engulfed with abuse of drug. That's because there is a full time mom looking after them.
We don't boast of the fact Muslims teens in America has got the lowest crime rate of any ethnicity. Why? The great mom is there.
The western society has too many things to learn from a model Muslim society. They will know how to cure their ills.
I don't agree with authors whining about lack of western style companionship in marriage. We look into something much deeper. It's about mutual trust and dependancy. As Muslims we are proud that marriage for us is a enduring relationship. And we don't go for partner hunting every few years. There is mating season for animals. It's not meant for mankind.
The only way I can agree with the author is the attitude of those Muslim men who are muslim by faith only. We must put into practice what our faith is. That's what Qur'an tells us to do.
Let's stop arguing, and be guided by Qur'aan.
i find all this very cruel.
when you talk abt equality, give the muslim gals the space to express, their inteeligence their true worth.
without which life will have no charm for the females.
i loved your article, i hope it provides sense to those who discourage females and suppress the females in the name of islam, while islam promotes education, its value and importance.
knowledge is power.
in L.A. OR ANY OTher city in usa muslim women are
having best of both worlds.most of them do not have to go to work and spend their free time watching ptv,ztv or other asian tv 24 hour programs or gossip or go shopping.while men are hard at work dealing with current hostile atmosphere .moreover women don,t have to deal with
in-laws and mother -in-laws rivalry which is prevalant in our asian societies.most of muslim women drive and that is a blessing for us men that
we don,t have to worry about shopping or taking kids to schools or other chores.you look in any
shopping mall and you see hijab wearing women doing shopping etc so the writer is not correct in
saying that women are confined in their homes.
"Ibn Abbas reported that a girl came to the Messenger of God, Muhammad, and she reported that her father had forced her to marry without her consent. The Messenger of God gave her the choice ...(between accepting the marriage or invalidating it). "(Ahmad, Hadeeth no. 2469). In another version, the girl said: "Actually I accept this marriage but I wanted to let women know that parents have no right to force a husband on them." [Ibn Majah] 3. The husband is responsible for the maintenance, protection, and overall headship of the family (qiwamah) within the framework of consultation and kindness. The mutual dependency and complementary of the roles of males and females does not mean "subservience" by either party to the other. Prophet Muhammad helped in household chores in spite of his busy schedule.
here a girl spoke up to the prophet herself so that parents know they have no right to force her to get married.So when are the muslimah going to express themselves and speak up???
Dear Ms Saadia Malik,
I beg to differ. On the contrary, I believe that Islam enjoins equal status to woman especially my dearest wife. As an illustration...
After almost ten years of marriage and my wife had to be retrenched after working for many years, she felt then that she deserved a break. Well a break from the daily routine of working from 9 to 5 in a multinational company. I obliged but we have to consider our two kids who are now 7 and 6 years old.She said she prefer to stay at home to look after the kids than working. No regrets. In fact she enjoys every minute of her stay at home. Now come the reality of life.
Presently, I'm completing my postgraduate thesis in the Master of Management programme. Do you know something, I enrolled my wife into the same university since she missed her chance when she was much younger. Both of us are studying and my two kids are school going.
Housework,laundry,meals and quality time spend on our kids are all divided equally. Of course the difficult part will be when there is exam and term paper to complete. Nonetheless, with frank communication, sincerity and a common goal towards achieving blessing from Allah in our daily ibadah, insyallah we live in peace and harmony.
As a muslim husband, I believe my wife has to be given her due rights to increase her knowledge in the field that is enjoined by Islam. For my wife's case, she loves Arabic and Dakwah. Hence the pursuit of excellence in the university is not for worldly gain but for her life in the Hereafter.
Any regret on my part as a Muslim husband. A definite no. What we need to instill in our heart as a married couple is to constantly communicate with our spouse in every aspect of our life. No secrets. Only through sincere comments,feedback or grievances that each party need to address will there be a way to solve marital problems they do exist.
Finally. insyallah I will consistently allow my wife to be given her due rights as a Musli
But as for the cooking and cleanning. I work inside my home doing hair and other deeds for the sisters....I do leave the house when necessary...to go grocery shopping, etc. But not to hang out...only in the sister's Halacah. Sisters have a tendency to gossip if the conversation is not about Allah. But we manage to have a good time. Barbeques, Aqika's, Walimahs, etc. We are not oppressed unless we want to be. Allah only tells us to protect our husbands property and be chase while he is away. The prophet sws used to serve his wives and when it was time for salat, he left. This is a western way of thinking (ie, the wife does all the cooking and cleanning). My husband actually told me it was Wajab for me to cook. I told him I want to see proof. The mothers of the believers had servants, where's mine. This is a man's world but I demand my rightful respect and all sisters should, we deserve it. It's not easy bearing children, working to help your husband make ends meet (if you wish) and cooking, cleanning and picking up his messes all day - We need a break and Allah knows best and he is most merciful.
Et apres on se plaint et levons nos voix en contestant la faon dont les autres diffament l'Islam?
La mentalit de la supriorit qui rgne parmi les hommes de nos socits est une situation honteuse. Professer d'tre des musulmans et vouloir que nos femmes soient protges contre les yeux prdateurs d'autres hommes c'est bien, et nous ne devons des d'excuses a qui que ce soit sur ce sujet. Mais la suppression des
femmes sous les exigences nausabondes de l'homme, la priver de l'ducation, de son droit et ses sentimements et d'expression et lui donner le symbole unique d'tre la rponse aux dsirs lascifs de l'homme n'est pas bien -le moindre qu'on puisse dire, il n'y a de quoi tre
Les croyants et les croyantes sont allis les uns des autres. Ils commandent le convenable, interdisent le blmable accomplissent la Salt, acquittent la Zakat et obissent Allah et Son messager. Voil ceux auxquels Allah fera misricorde, car Allah est Puissant et Sage. Coran -- At-Tauba Sourate 9 Aya 71
L'pouse ne doit surtout pas demander une heure pour un simple d'entretien, parce que l'Islam encourage que la femme permettre son mari de se dtendre puisqu'videmment il lui fournit la nourriture, les vtements et un abri. Elle n'en a pas besoin et ne devrait pas exiger plus.
Il fait sa part du travail et va au lit. Elle fait sa part du travail et doit aller au lit pour se lever encore tt le matin et prparer le petit djeuner pour le cheri. Pour sur, il a une dure journee devant lui. Le week-end s'approche finalement et elle lui fait bon accueil avec les bras grand ouverts. Une semaine dure, plein de corves la maison et l'action nulle la laisse
puise. Mais alors, il mrite bien aussi du repos. Elle a interet ne pas s'habituer au draps et ne pas s'habituer au petit-dejeuner au lit bien prpar pour son homme qui videmment, mrite de s'habituer au draps lui. Elle se sent fatigue et manque de sommeil mais elle doit montrer le meilleur sourire pour lui plaire.
Il avait videmment travaill tout la semaine dans son intrt a elle. Il l'approche pour acqurir l'un des plaisirs qu'il doit obtenir. Elle ne peut pas refuser parce que sa religion l'interdit. Elle doit la comprendre. Lui n'a pas besoin de comprendre sa religion, un point c'est tout.
tant tranger la religion de l'Islam, je marche dans le village de Jubala - une rgion sous-dveloppe et dont l'ducation est absente. On m'a dit que les habitants sont Musulmans. Je serai facilement men a comprendre que l'Islam est dfini par les coutumes anciennes des tribus de la rgion.
Considrez une autre illustration.
tant en quelque sorte trangere la religion de
l'Islam, j'entre dans la ville de Zameersi - une rgion relativement dveloppe et ou l'ducation est presente. On m'a dit qu'une grande majorit des habitants sont des musulmans. Je comprends qu'ainsi, l'Islam fait parti de l'activit des gents locaux. J'ai t informe que l'Islam est une foi tolrante. Elle accorde le statut gal aux hommes et les femmes et elle encourage la
Helas! Mon observation fut oppos toutes les notions prconues. L'Islam n'encourage pas le traitement des femmes dans la similarit parfaite aux hommes. Bien au contraire, en fait. Ma dcouverte se doit une chance d'affiliation avec une famille locale. L'homme se prepare pour le travail. La dame reste la maison. Elle n'est pas cense participer a aucune acticvite
intellectuelle puisque ce n'est pas une option et ne fait pas partie de l''quation. Plutt, elle est cense rester la maison, cuisiner et garder la maison propre. Elle prend une heure ou deux. Puis quoi ? Peut-elle sortir au moins que pour prendre air ? Pas du tout. Sa religion exige d'elle de rester l'intrieur de sa maison et d'attendre l'assidu, l'individu tout mritant de rentrer a la maison. Onze heures dans le bureau et il a gagn le salaire du jour.
Ce serait juste si on lui permettait une ou deux heures avec des copains. Dix heures et il serai temps pour lui de revenir a la maison. Le dner serait prt d'ici l. Srement, c'est deja servi. humainement - ca se comprend quand meme qu'il veuille s'assoupir.
As the editor cautioned the translation softwares are not perfects. I reviewed/corrected this article to make it comprehensible in french.
Comme l'editeur avait cautioner les softwares de traduction ne sont pas parfaits. J'ai revue/corriger cet article pour le rendre comprehensible en francais
Les Hommes suffocant la Foi
Je me suis souvent senti attristee par la facon dont la mass mdia trangere projecte la condition sociale des femmes sous la bannire de l'Islam. Tout en sachant que l'Islam encourage l'galit parfaite entre les hommes et les femmes, que l'Islam est proclame au monde comme une foi qui deprive les femmes, les emprisonne entre les quatre murs de leurs maisons et alternativement, meprise celles qui placent les pieds en dehors de leur maison. Je me suis donc rendu compte qu'en fait ni la press trangeres ni les non-Musulmans ne doivent tre blms.
Mais qu'il importe aux hommes qui professent l'Islam regarder sous leur peau, dans leur sang avec lequel ils asphyxient le souffle de l'Islam et obstruent la vie hors de lui et qu' en effet, dpeignant l'Islam comme une religion cruelle.
Les hommes d'une autre croyance ne comprendront une autre religion qu'a partir de la manire dont elle est pratiquee par l'autre, parce que tous n'irons pas jusqu'a remonter aux sources originales avec la plus grande dvotion afin d'atteindre le vrai sens de la religion de l'autre.
Considrez l'illustration suivante.
How can we change this. I think by teaching the younger generation about our Prophet's own conduct and the understanding he (saw) brought us we can hope that they will be a better example to the community at large.
I am not condoning the wrongful practices of muslim men in dealing with their women. Making generalized statement is not the way to correct mistakes.
Why is that men and women quarrel regarding women's status, rights, do's and don'ts etc. on so many forums? Do you want to fall in line with God Almighty Allah and His Final Prophet's views as in the Holy Qur'an -the words of God and the Hadees (Hadith) Books-The words and deeds of the Prophet (P.B.U.H). It seems that these people want to set a new direction on the question of women and their status? How dare the people teach God and His Prophet -regarding what should the woman do and what should be her status. Why blame Islam? why cry foul? Why don't they talk straight (some pseudo muslim women) and then say that Islam really is discriminatory; God Almighty Allah is unjust and discriminatory against them? Actually those who have disease in their hearts do not want listen to God and His prophet's words. They comment in their own ways.
Now what is that person's age who is posting all such non sensical issues related to women and crying foul with Islam? Did he or she study Islam completely and properly in the unbiased manner? Did they find out that Islam has any thing to discrinate against women? Don't they observe that the jury which decides the case of an accused person, goes through all the aspects of the case with an unbiased attitude and studies all the relevant documents? How come these people accuse God and His Prophet? Are they more just and merciful unto women folk than God? Did God not give them milk in their mother's breast to feed them and then these people observe His laws from the view point of Kafirs and the followers of Satan? How come they abandon God's laws and then start judging from their own view points? Is it not the same way the satan followed and then expelled from Heavenly position. Now if you want to save from the Ever lasting Hell, study Islam unbiasedly, don't fall into the ditch dug by Satan for those who oppose Islam, decide as per God's laws. Taliban were wrong. Islam is not wrong.Muslim men must follow Islamic w
Im a girl from Iran and im muslem.I asked for your help for my friend whom is hindu and lives in India,and you replied my mail im so grateful for your attention i thought you will never reply this type of emails but ill pray on ALLAH to bless you all for your attempts to introduce real pure Islam to all the world.
after i recieved your reply i talked to my hindu friend and he was so happy when i said you can help him in this way.but the problem is his parent are very strict hindus and he cant clear this thing to them.
I suppose you had asked about his phone number.His mobile number is : (+91)9811015609
I tell you one thing,that he has gone to a mosque near his house but they havnt allowed him to enter it and they have shouted on him because as you know in India hindus are not allowed to enter the mosques so that he cant go there to convert to Islam also.We dont know what to do and im here in Iran and i cant do much for him but when i was in Delhi in India he used to come with me to JAMA MASJID there and im sure that he loves Islam but the attitude of muslems there isnt proper. I really need your help because now he wants to say his SHAHADAH and he is asking for my help and i dont know what to do.
please help us.
ALLAH bless you all.
a girl from Islamic Republic Of Iran.
The fact is, to each his/her own. Allah ordained that the man should go out to find the means to sustain himself and his family while the woman stays at home to raise their children to be Muslims with real Taqwa (Fear of Allah).
The man is the protector of the woman and children. The woman protects the honor of her husband by protecting her modesty. She is also the protector her husband's house while he is away.
The woman is obliged to fulfill her husband's sexual desire, and the husband is also obliged to fulfill his wife's sexual needs.
In short, in Islam, the role of man and woman are equal but not identical.
"It may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows, and you know not." Baqara:216
And Allah knows best
To my new sister Mary H welcome and peace to you. Don't let a few misguided people chase you from the deen. Know also that among convert or reverts to Islam that most are women almost 3to1 all have come because of the truth of what Islam is and a lot have run into the same nonsence that you have. Don't let it discourage you Allah chooses who he wants for his deen and he choose you. For you and others who are interested go to the following site to find some things of interest http://www.csiw.org/Islam06.htm. It will disturb a lot of Muslim men to find women who think, but it disturbs a lot of men everywhere to find a woman that can think. I believe it has something to do with the jealousy that a lot of men feel that Allah choose women to be the bringers of life. That is why men spend so much time trying to invent or create something. They know that you hold to key to their line being continued and sometimes it makes us act like fools. By the same token women should understand and cherish this great responsibility and burden. But know this it is not all you were meant to do or be. This Ummah can only be successful with the full participation of all of its members. We must stop treating women like second class citizens the civil rights movement in American would have not succeeded if women had just stayed at home and been invisible. Islam places a very great importance on the home, but it was never ment to be all that you can do nor is it to be your problem exclusively. Look to the Prophets homelife he cooked,mended his clothes and took care of children his and others. Women in Islam received rights that women in America wouldn't get for 2000 years and men have since the death of the Prophet tried to take them away. Study the lives of the early women of Islam and you will find judges and religous scholars as well as wives and warriors. To be a Muslim is to be the best human being possible and that always has more than one demension.
Cultural abuses of women do take place. Look at the rape laws in countries like Pakistan,India and Nigeria where to prove rape a woman must have four witnesses.The roles laid out in the Qur'an are not there to limit what one can and cannot do but to lay responsibilty for certain aspects of home life.The example of the Prophets home, where he mended his own clothes and took care of the children along with his wifes. Third he never prohibited women from the mosque. There are hadith in which he says it is better for women to pray at home but as with all hadith the question needs to be asked under what conditions was the statement made. It is a fact that the rights that were given to women by the Qur'an and the Prophet have been erroded ever since and by 600 years after his death they were all gone and the Ummah was in serious decline in spite of it's conquest of other lands. Just think there are places where women cannot vote or own property both of these were given to women long before they got them here in America. Brothers ask yourself if your wife needs a medical exam would you rather she went to man or woman Dr.? And how can she go to a woman if there are none? True there are some lazy women that want nothing more than someone to take care of them but not many. Also no where in the Qur'an or sunnah does it say women may only wear black in public what is does say more or less is that the clothes should be loose fitting. The same holds true for men,but how many follow it. It hurts me to hear men say,my wife will cover or else while he has not beard and only comes to the Mosque on Friday if then. I hurt even more to see women divorced with no education and no skills and the exhusband who is supposed to pay upkeep doesn't. Kadija owned a business Aisha raced camels against the Prophet and was a judge in matters of religion.The first women of Islam were judges,warriors,religous scholars and wifes. Why can't they be that today? Brothers grow up!
It is very important nowadays that media strives to present the truth. As Satan and its allies and the likes of pharoh are trying to falsify the truth and paint falsehood as the truth, it becomes extremly important that people bearing the media torch present the right and not just present 'anything' to have some points scored on the 'freedom of speech' record. I consider it a huge responsibility to run mass media and hope that editorial staff of Renaissance should at least read an article before publishing it. We already have plenty of the likes of CNN, so please do not give us another one. Please try to come up with constructive articles instead of uneducated and sarcastic ones. Ask your writers to be comprehensive and have complete information available or at least more than what they currently have before writing anything on a subject. Allah know best and he watches everything.
"Alas! My observance runs averse to all pre-conceived notions. Islam does not enjoin the treatment of men in perfect likeness to women. Quite contrary, in fact. My discovery owes itself to a chance affiliation with a local family. The man sets out to work. The lady of the house stays at home and starts calling wherever she can. She spends hours relaxing and calling her friends while filling up the air with lame talk and fruitless conversations, not to mention the back biting that she is so fond of and a gigantic phone bill that she piles up on her husband every month. She does not want to be involved in any intellectual exhibition since that is not an option on her side of the 'equation'. Rather, she wants to stay at home, enjoy cool air while her husband toils on busy streets of town and over-crowded buses. As the time for lunch draws close, she orders junk food from a local fast food place. She has already become too fat to be attractive to her husband. As it gets milder in temperature she puts on some tight clothes so that she looks taller and not fatter and sets out to spend hard earned money without thinking or without any real need. As she walks down the street she invites chasing eyes that affix their line of sight to her bosoms. Does she mind? Not at all. It takes 2 or 3 hours and she gets back with a couple of shopping bags. Then what? Reading a short passage from the Quran or prayer may be? Not at all. Luckilly she has brought a new Salman khan's movie and it would be a nice pass time. As her husband returns, she greets him with a flurry of complains about how the life is miserable and how she was embarrased by seeing a new, never seen before dress worn by her friend and how much is she deprived of new clothes. Her husband tries to convince her that his income is getting lower and he is already worried. As he gets ready for dinner, he is asked to bring loaves of bread and some gravy from the market.
I'm from France and this is the first article I have receiced since I logged in Islamicity.com.
This article is interesting because it says some realities that many muslims don't want to see.My bad english speaking don't allow me to talk more.
But thank you for this article.
wa salam alaikum
The article in question was simply 'pathetic'. The author lacks the maturity to write on Islamic issues. She is just romanticizing and trying to create sympathy on a non-issue. She says that she feels dejected on how western media projects the status of women under the banner of Islam. She is right and almost every Muslims feels that way, but she probably seems to be influenced by their projection of Islam. Have some confidence in you for God sake! Islam has nothing to do with what is going on around us. Whoever the oppressor may be, wheather Men or Women, is to blame and not the religion. If the lady stays at home, that is her choice or may be her husband's, but Islam did not command her or her husband to do that. Blaming Islam for that is not the way to go.
In her 3rd illustration she is close to mocking Islam when she says wife cannot refuse sex even if she is tired. Come on! whats the big deal and why are you making such a big deal about it. You are using such an indirect analogy and even the analogy does not hold. The hadith which says that wife cannot refuse is under normal circumstances and it does not say that whatever may happen to a woman she cannot refuse sex. In essence, author is trying to make a point out of her misunderstanding of the hadith. Otherwise, she would have known better that same Islam forbids having sex when woman is in her period.
It is very important nowadays that media strives to present the truth. As Satan and its allies and the likes of pharoh are trying to falsify the truth and paint falsehood as the truth, it becomes extremly important that people bearing the media torch present the right and not just present 'anything' to have some points scored on the 'freedom of speech' record.
When I look at my family now that we grew old,my sisters are doing so well for themselves since they had to work extremely hard to accomplish their goals ,on the contrary my only brother that I love very much is struggling with the very basics of life cause he was so spoiled growing up.
I truly never blamed my dad who was bright enough to give us an education,but the pressures of our mmuslim society that favors male over female.
You projected a picture of reality, which is in practice in most of the so called muslim countries. Please don't forget that, this is not the true picture or teachings of Islam. We should not relate to Islam our way of so called Islamic life, which is contrary to the true teachings.
May Allah swt bless you for your thoughts and give all of us the true guidance of Islam Inshallah.
habbika kairul qalki kulli hamee.
May Almighty Allah continue to keep us under the umbrella of Islam and may we adhere to the Sunna of Sayedeena Rasooli Akram(salallahu alaihi wa salaam)in all matters.
Never in all my 25 years of being a muslim wife and mother have i felt the way you have expressed in my day to day life of a home maker. although the basis of islam is the the same for all who profess to be muslim each geographical area will reflect the culture of the area which by no means has anything to do with islam.and should be pointed out as such.under developed countries see no need for the high quality of education you may find that in the USA one has to have in order to get a good job to take care of one family.Similiarly it is costumary/culturalfor a man to maintain his family thus there is no need for one's spouse to do anything other than maintain one's home and children this does not mean the husband wishes his wife to be uneducated as you have stated.there religions other than islam which make it apractice for the ladies to be home makers but as i have previously pointed a lot of this is cultural not based upon religion for the bases of religion are always the same.
What about our great Islamic traditions of Women Scholars, yes there were many many of us! What about Umm Hani(Mariam)1376-1466 from Cairo, born in the middle of Shaban, scholar, who studied under many masters,one of whom was her grandfather... she was the mother of As-Shafi, Saifuddin Mohammed Hanafi, Younus al-Maliki, and Mansour Hanbali- her sons studied the under schools of law which they came to be known under.
She brought a factory! She was a working woman.
Ibn Hagar wrote a book called Accurately Measuring the Companions of the Prophet (SAW) and he wrote that out of the 12,043 notables amongst the Sahabas 1,551 were women! There were probably many more, but many names we won't know because of the nature of Islamic modesty.
Imam As-Sakhawi in his book mentions 11,691 greatest scholars of his age, not looking at sex, 1,075 were women.
In the 13th and 14th women there were many women scholars. And we can never forget Aisha (RA)!
Ibn Hagar, when he went to Damascus, he only had 4 teachers of Hadith, and they were ALL women.
Women have disappeared as notables and scholars. Why??? Why don't we ask ourselves this question... instead of balming the media... We need to give the right to education back to our women... Knowledge is a duty upon men and women. If we don't educate the women in our homes, how will she teach our children, and how we will have an Ummah that isn't steeped in ignoracne of our way of life?
Whilst I know exactly where you are coming from, I know many brothers out there do not oppress their wife's. Those who do are either ignorant or have no regards for the mother of their children.
I believe marriage is far more than about having your dinner on the table and fulfilling sexual desires. It is about teamwork, about give and take, it is about getting through life. The bond has to be there. The respect has to be mutual. The trust has to paramount. Above all love has to be there. Love for Allah and his messenger pbuh, love for each other and love for the kids
thanks for your time and effort you are givving our great islam
one point i'd like to raise:
islam also considers the capabilities of each sex (the male and the female) that is why i think islam doesn't consider the equality absolute but each has to do what goes with the capabilities God has created in him, otherwise why the prophets where males none of them was a female. because the work of delivering the message of God requires body strength which is in the man more than in the woman.
faith" by Saadia Malik, emailed to me by
The article has very little information about the
actual status of woman in Islam, with no
references to the Quran or Hadith, and reads
more like the bickering of an illiterate
housewife who finds it a burden to be a wife, a
mother, a caretaker.
The sorry state of affairs described in the
article suits a feminist site better than a
respectable Islamic newsletter like yours.
Even a Hindu woman from the working,
uneducated class in India will have the same
story to share. The problem is social, and not
religious. Dragging in the tenets of Islam into
this eternal debate of men vs. women is
I think it is confused writers like Sadia who
give Islam a bad name by showcasing social
problems as Islamic ones.
may Allah make islamicity a better means for understanding Islam.
I am so happy that someone else is seeing it the way I have seen it. I am a new convert for two years. I came to Islam strickly because Allah (swt) brought me to this wounderful religon. But I am a single sister who has experienced this behaveroir from other sister from other countries thinking that they are better than me. Because I have to be out of the house to support myself and my child. But yet doesn't try to help lift the burden off of me buy helping me to find a husband that will help me and to complete the other half of my deen. But I am the the one wearing my hijab to work and being ridiculed by other people and giving Dawah to these people who don't know Islam by just my actions. While they stay at home and look down on me or any other woman that is out there working because she has to and has no choice. May Allah (swt) have mercy on them when the day of judgements come and they are asked about this. Why they didn't help there neighbour when they were in need. Masalama
I do believe that the narrow mindset of alot of men who profess to be Muslims is a huge stumbling block on the "path". Historically women in Islam were strong and worked along side their men if necessary to preserve their way of life. The Prophet (PBUH) encouraged his wives if they demonstrated abilities that would further the cause of Islam. Aisha was one wife that took to the battle field. So how can it be said that the women of Islam should be held prisoner in this wonderful religion? I believe that the truth of Islam is being distorted by those who seek to maintain power of the weak...and that is not the way Islam was intended to reign.
Upon reading the article written by Saadia Malik concerning "Gender Equality in Islam," I find many experiences similar to the one's already expressed by her own personal experiences. This issue clearly needs to be addressed and looked at by those who continue to not accept change in the sociological dimension of time. Islam is a very practical religion in its practice for everyday life, but there are many sociological, interpretational,and traditional influences that has shadowed the true "equality" amongst men and women in Islam. The contributions that both men and women make in the world generally should be of import when seeking to maintain the basic structural civilization of the human race Allah has created. These particular contributions should be afforded to the need of acceptance that both men and women have been given the greatest gift of all of Allah's creations...."intelligence," and therefore should be utilized with the principles of Islam attached to the main objective of the betterment of mankind in general. The now present complexed structures of society makes it necessary for all to contribute first and foremost in securing our homelife and then partaking in the community by educating ourselves to the level where our contributions become more diversed and beneficial to the whole.
I would hope the understanding of the times, as it relates to the intent of the roles given to both men and women,would be adhered to without finding fault nor having a feeling of superiority of one over the other because of the differences. It's the differences that make the uniqueness of the faith, practical and rewarding when each role is clearly defined, but at the same time, to appreciate what each as individuals can offer to benefit the whole of mankind.
I read an article by S.Malik in which she says that "Khatam e Quran" is BIDAA. Bidaa is when you make something a part of Islam and say that, that is how in the religion is done, wher as no body neither the Quran nor the prophet has said any thing about it. My question to her well, the Quran was never compiled in the form of a book for as long as the Prophet lived but,it was done so by the thinking of Omar with the consultation of AbuBakr. Is that Bidaa????
It is not enough to claim the "Civilized" world Islamic teachings are peaceful and tolerant, you must explain that to the millions of ignorant, illiterate, un-educated masses of Muslims who obviously see things differently than you all do.
As a Non-Muslim, I am now very suspicious of ALL Muslims because I don't see too many Muslims willing to stand-up to the cowardly psychopathic extremists who have taken control of the religion and given it a bad name in the eyes of Non-Muslims.
Have some guts and stand-up to the extremists and quit whining to normally fair minded people in western countries who are now suspicious of any Muslim they now see.
Muslims have to take back their religion and restore its good name. Nobody else can do this for you. You must stand-up to the crazy peopel among you.
I'm a happily married wife my husband encouraged me to take my masters degree in computer science, his support and kindness sometimes emparesses me when I'm in short of time and effort to clean or cook, he simply accepts that and offers a dinner out, he is very successful at his work, kind with his parents, and my parents as well.
among all my relatives and friends I only know one case where her husband does not treat her well.
I consider this a major success,
I don't think we should drag ourselves behind those who are attacking Islam, by pointing to examples that are existing in all socities.
I sincerly beleive the muslim woman is the most fortunate woman in all aspects, she has a secure home, a devoted husband, who would always be there for her support and protection.
As humans we tend to through the blame on our parteners and find ourselves as innocent as lame.
Allah says in the Quran (the meaning)
Nor can goodness and Evil be equal. Repel (Evil) with what is better: Then will he between whom and thee was hatred become as it were thy friend and intimate!"41:34
If all of us put this verse from the Quran in front of our eyes I don't think problems would ever exist inside Muslim comunity or with Muslims and others
if both husband and wife, reflect upon this verse all of these problems will vanish and instead, love, devotion, and happiness will be lived.
i would also like to point out that islam is not a religion for the ignorant.because the first verse revealed to the Prophet of islam was 'read'. so the sickness in every islamic nation is lack of knowledge on the practical application of islam. i wholehearted agree with you that 'we' portray islam in a bad way 'cos of ignorance.
Insha'Allah, Allah's promise will be fulfilled, which ever route we take, time will come when everyone will embrace islam.and dear sister please try to be soft when writing next time so that the ignorant would be geared to seek knowledge on how to practise islam.
sometimes alter the religion. Employ our Brothers and Sisters to return to the basics of the Quran, and trying to alter it for our convenience, i.e.
the Quran does not tell you to cover your hair...
Astagh-firullah! Sister Khadijah (R.A.) was a
business woman... Sister Aisha (R.A.) lead wars.
The Quran encites us to think, ponder. We've become so... complacent.
Thank you sister for your excellent article.
The Verse of Holy Qur'an at the end of your article tells us great deal about our role as the two pillars of Islamic Society.The Believers, men and women, are protectors one of another: they enjoin what is just, and forbid what is evil: they observe regular prayers, practice regular charity, and obey God and His Messenger. On them will God pour His mercy: for God is Exalted in power, Wise (Quran 9:71 )
Present day muslim leaders/rulers either tend to be more corrupt than non muslim leaders when it comes to women's affairs (the secular leaders) or more stricter and unwise (example Taliban) than the Sahaba Kiram and the 4 Islamic Rightly Guided Caliphs (Khalifas) who ruled after Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).
The problem is either our rulers are not interested in implementing the Islamic Laws or when they want to do it, they are very tight (like Taliban) and kill women and destroy them emotionally as well.
We have to treat women like the Prophet did (peace be upon him). There is no other way.
Unfortunately the trouble with us muslims is that we have been pyschologically brainwashed and now have developed a inferiority complex. Now our main criteria is that instead of pleasing Allah(SWT), we are more concerned about making our deen more pleasing to the eyes of west. We are more concerned about the image of Islam. Who are trying to impress here? What is this a popularity contest? No matter what image you show or potray, they will for sure look at the negative.
It is men choking Islam, it is people who try to be the "apologists". It is you and me, who are not following Islam to the fullest, who are responsible. We have abandoned education, deen and we are reaping what we have sowed.
The picture the writer is trying to paint of intellectually repressed woman is wrong? Does she know that, in a poor household, the woman is more concerned about the food on the table rather than being "intellectually" enlightned.
Education part is done before the marriage not during marriage. How she and her husband interact, is the result of culture not religion. That's why her scenario stands true in the rural regions of all developing countries.
Equality between has never been there or will be. Allah (SWT) created Eve from Adam. How can something thats created from something both be equal? We each have our responsibilies, that we each should try to accomplish to the best of our ability.
the treatment of women in most countries that
"profess" to be Islamic.
However in no way can one blame Islam for
this. Lets take an example, if a man is sick
and goes to the Doctor, gets a prescription for
medication that will cure his disease, but he
does not follow the instructions as they were
given, instead he takes the medicine at the
wrong time, or takes one pill instead of two. or
he stops taking it before the complete course
is over, obviously he will not get the results he
was hoping for, can you blame the Doctor for
Similarly, if we as Muslims, especially in the
case of men take some of the Quran and
Hadeeth and follow it while ignoring the rest,
how then can we blame Islam.
So my sister, I do believe that we can raise
our voice and say "how dare they defame
As for men mistreating women and being
insensitive, I do believe this is a phenomenan
prevalent even in Western Society where there
Alhumdolilah to be a muslim.this issue has been discussed many times and in all ages how islam deal with the equality of man and woman.and much has been said about it.i did find myself confused at times with this subject, not because i doubt the linings about it in islam but rather because of my own fault at not knowing the issue well from it's islamic perspective or simply call it my **ignorance regarding the issue**.and have finally come to a set of rules to look at it and advise it to those brothers and sisters who unfortunately and ultimately blame islam for it,consciouly or unconsciouly as it's root cause.First for sisters,with all due respect, that they should not look at this from men point of view or the way they act in this regard as how they treat their women but rather should make a clear understanding that, that person may not very well be performing his duties as a good muslim,which is the case in majority,thus victimizing islam in this situation will be a mistake made in one's own behalf.
Another way to deal with this is to understand the fact that if one claim that he/she is a good believer then their duty is to follow the principal of islam as a **whole package** rather try fixing it for one's need as it will indeed cause the chaos we all muslims has fallen into today, which is instead to see how we can adopt islam but to how can islam adopt us.Islam has perfectly outlined for equality in both men and women and that all these teachings should be simply realized,institutionalized and socialized.may Allah bless us with the best understandings of this perfect way of life as He has blessed our souls with as born muslims and make it light for other to Him through our acting upon it.Amin.
Alas the sister writing this article is correct. Cultural prejudices have made women slaves in most of the Islamic world. The gains that the Qur'an and the Prophet gave to women have been erroded since his death slowly but surley. We forget or ignore the fact that during his time women were judges and collectors of Hadith. There opinions on all matters of faith were sought. They fought in wars and tended the sick on the battle fields. They were allowed to earn money and to get an education. Now the only visible Muslims are women. Men look just like the non-believers. They don't wear beards but insist that women cover. They don't want women to be seen by men but don't allow them to go to medical schools to become doctors, so that when they are sick they have to go to non-believing men to be examined. Islam is a beautiful religion that allows for the growth and development of all of its followers, as long as we imprision over 2/3s of our population our growth will be stunted. Look at the terrible situation in Nigeria where a woman is to be stoned to death while the man is set free a simple DNA test would have proven the mans guilt or inocence and yet none was ordered and men cheered when the verdict of death was announced. I have long felt that the greatest damage to Islam is done not by non-believers but by Muslims themselfs. Funny thing is most of todays converts to Islam are women,because they study the faith as it was practiced by the Prophet and his immediate followers. It is only in those so called Muslim countries of the middle east that women are treated like second class citizens. I do not advocate women going uncoverd or wearing short skirts but I do want them well educated in both deen and the ways of todays world. We cannot be a strong Ummah if we only use half of our resources. I think that men are afraid and hide that fear in misrepresenting Sunnah and Hadith. It is time to untie our other hand.
Why would we think we can be different then God.
Islam teaches all are equal.