birth control

Salaam Alaikum Moderator Amah

I so apologize!  Astafurllah I wasn't even thinking!  I was so focused on quoting sources that it didn't even occur to me!

It's not Brother Israfil's issue, it's mine. I totally was not thinking... my intention wasn't to be sexually explicit, and I do not believe that discussing sex is immodest, as there is no daleel for this Islamically, according to your rules yes, Islam no.

Brothr Israfil- ask a sheik who is a both a medical doctor and a scholar. Or ask a medical doctor who is a devout Muslim.

Go to some one who is totally educated.

My opinion only~

Bismillah..

Assalaamualaikum,

Brother Israfil, it is better if you go and ask a shaikh yourself. Such explicit discussions are unappropriate on this forum where very young minds may browse.

Sister umm Aminata, remember, modesty is a branch of faith.

Wassalaam.

Peace & Blessings Angel

I'm so sorry, I didn't reply to you earlier, I just now noticed your post, and I just now realized I'm in the men's section!

lol

I'm a former Catholic myself, and I have seen some groups of Muslims and some Scholars who have very similar beliefs regarding birth control as the Catholic church. It was easy for me to spot being a former Catholic.

I hope my post helped educate you a little bit. The beauty about Islam in my opinion is that there are differences and there is a balance. I see my choice as a balance. There are some scholars who even say that if a woman can't get pregnant for medical reasons every year or is insane that birth control should be used while at the other end of the specturm there are those who say the more the better!

I find that the scholars who are also secularly educated such as those who are medical doctors, and scientists realize that having a woman pregnant next year is very dangerous to her own physical and mental health. In a modern society having large family is harder aside from finances the extended family system doesnt exist anymore. I mean look at what happened to Andrea Yates! I wonder how many of her exist in Islamic socities or so called Muslim populated countries. Money is really your smallest money by a long shot, forget about affording children financially can you afford them psychologically, can your marriage afford them?

And lets remeber some one do like being pregnant and never get over their baby lust. I'm one of them which is why I have an IUD in place. I'd have ten children already, but I know my self very well, and I know I couldn't handle that many children even with a six figure income, and a nanny. I'd go totally crazy.

I think every issue regarding Islam is an emotional issue for many of us for very deep seated reasons.  When I post or speak or what ever, I try hard to not advise or even propogate based off my personal preferences. I try to advise based off a general standard because I know that a one size fits all solution is a fairy tale gone way bad for many women.

Peace and blessings

Concerning the issue of birth control Islamically continued:

I am now sumarizing or paraphrasing please consult your local Imam to verify the accuracy or soundness for your own personal comfort and saftey.

The rights of a Muslim child:

1. The right to be concieved and born in wedlock.
2. The right to an honerable name.
3. The right to be Muslim meaning: the parents themselves must teach, and train the children to be Muslim knowing the five pillars of Islam, the six pillars of eman, the Qur'an, the Sunnah, and the sacred law as it applies to their individual situation.
4. The right to food, clothing, and shelter.
5. The right to know, and learn a trade before leaving home.
6. The right to marriage to an honerable Muslim or Muslima.
7. The right to compassionate, patience, and care.
8. The right to be breastfed by the mother or a wet nurse.
9. The right to two parents or access to the farther.
10. The right to maternal and paternal grandparents if they are living.

If you can provide this for each child than you should keep having children, but lets remember that:

• each parents psychological, emotional, and spiritual well being must be sufficent to do so.
• each parents intellectual and cognitive skills must be sufficent to do so.
• each parents relationship with Allah and degree of worship must be sufficent to do so.
• each parents knowledge of Islam must be sufficent to do so.
• each parents physical and mental well being must be sufficent to do so.
• one parent prefferably the farther must have the ability to financially support the Islamic, secular{trade} health, nutrition, clothing, and shelter needs of each child according to his means, according to socioeconomic level.

Not doing meeting these requirments intentionally is volating the rights of the child according to sheria law. Unlike most secular law, children's rights and responsibilities go above and beyond the three squares meals a day and a public education. No muslim child should be illiterate in their deen or secular education.

In cases of divorce or where the mother is single, these rights still apply the farther is bound to honor and implement the sacred law no matter how much he hates or dislikes his ex-wife, they still are his children.  Divorce is not an acceptable excuse to neglect the rights of a Muslim child ever.

continued..