Private messages to women

Because it took me three times telling you to knock it off when you were emailing my private email.  Or would  you like me to post where I told you to knock it off and then you came back and started going off about how you though I was your friend and how I was being oversensitive.  Buddy, that's harassment. 

Oh, and I could mention another incident of harassment by you, but I've promised the sisters involved I wouldn't use names. 

The internet is a public place, but PMs are PRIVATE MESSAGES.  If a woman doesn't want to talk to a man in private, its her right.  You calling it being uptight is acting like it isn't her right.

Israfil...I've learned one important thing from my last year dealing with you.  You don't like being told your wrong and you don't like the word "No."

The problem is some women do not feel comfortable talking to men in private.  You should respect that.  Its not about being uptight, its about comfort level.  You're one of the worst here for not taking no for an answer.  If a woman says she doesn't want to talk, then she doesn't.  Deal with it.  And don't call her uptight.

Israfil,

Perhaps I should point out why I consider it inappropriate.  I met my husband online.  We developed a close friendship that later became love.  I personally know how the little bits of data back and forth can lead to something very inimate.

One of my Prophets once instructed us to "avoid even the appearance of evil." 

I usually look over the question and determine comfort level.  But many Muslimahs would be even less comfortable about some things I've been asked than I was. 

Perhaps a good rule of thumb is, would you feel comfortable with another man asking your sister this question.  If you are unsure, then its best not to ask.

Israfil,

I disagree.  Sometimes the posts are just wholy unwelcomed.  The women have every right to tell a man they do not wish to receive messages from them.  Any messages after that are strictly harassment.  I think that instead of deleting it, its best to just let the person know that you are not interested in private conversation.

I know I've been actually hit on twice since I've been here.  TWICE!  Both men were informed very curtly that I was a married woman and it was inappropriate for them to be private messaging me.  End of story. 

The best thing a man can do is send a message asking if they may inquire privately about an issue.  If the woman does not want to do so, then she can say No then.  Easy and no feelings hurt.