How to save my marriage and my sanity |
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Hurtingalot
Starter. Female Joined: 25 November 2017 Status: Offline Points: 1 |
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Posted: 25 November 2017 at 3:27pm |
I've been married for over a year. My husband has terrible anger issues and resorts to abusive comments like everybody said u were bad i still married you.. you are indecent etc. Once hes calm he says it was out of anger. I had a job in canada lived freely social bird etc.. i moved out n lived in middle east a city where i wasnr allowed to drive or go anywhere without him. I had a small studio apt. I never complained i was happy it was my first home. In a year our fights were all about control he didnt like something i wore to be too revealing talking to a guyfriend he would yell and throw tantrums. We got past that and i would avoid topics to upset him and he was amazing then..i guess he adjusted to me too and what triggered me. The best husband he would be in our good times.. 6 months were great but i was living in hurt of all the emotional abuse he put me thru in the begining. Anyway i left middle east on a good note
In canada for 2 months .. i didnt board the plane today. He managed to fight with me everyday for the first few weeks here..i ended up blocking him waiting for him to apologize and behave..he sent me one sorry and lovey dovey email But when i disnt respond for 8 hrs he called me back yelling we ended up swearing and i blocked him again.. But he got worse and would email me harsh emails. My trip and seeing family after a year was ruined. A month of not talking i tried calling him conference with his best friend to try n talk sense in him. He yelled and blamed everything on me. 4 days before my flight back he started telling pls come back we will sort everything face to face. I refused. He started getting angry again n refused to settle in canada if i dont come back . A day before my flight he asked me if im coming again when i said no. He threatened divorce and blocked me. My flights missed and saudi arabia rules once landing visa date expires to reissue is months n months of long process. I am so hurt. I miss home there that i left in tact. Last time i saw him at the airport.. I still miss him but knew i needed to be treated with respect. I miss our wonderful moments. I feel like i should have handled his anger better coz he was lonely there..i wish i could restart my trip home in canada again.. now only thingthat will bring us together will be immig to go thru i dont know how much longer. Im experiencing major anxiety. hardly sleep eat and smoke every half hr. Last time i felt this way was when my sister died 2 years ago. I dont know how to fix this marriage and i dont know how to make him realize. |
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ACTOR
Starter. Male Joined: 20 November 2017 Location: Nigeria Status: Offline Points: 4 |
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good day, firstly sorry for what you are passing through, all you have to do is to pray and feed him with some suitable marriage lecture mostly in the night, only if he is not violence.
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fais
Senior Member Joined: 24 August 2009 Location: Oman Status: Offline Points: 344 |
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Hello Sister,
If your husband is a Saudi and you have to live in Saudi Arabia then I would say you should not go back to such an abusive man. Woman does not have much freedom if she is abused and she does not know Arabic. So if you want to continue with this relation, give him a choice to join you in Canada. there are psychologists and marriage counselors who can assist but in Saudi your man is your owner. Hope Allah help you. Regards Faisal |
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