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Family Matter
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Joined: 02 December 2012
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Quote bobinogz Replybullet Topic: Need advice for my situation about marria
    Posted: 02 December 2012 at 6:20am
I really need help, Me and a brother met in College we had the niyaah to get to know one another for marraige and nothing else. He is 21 and I am 19 we both told our families, my dad is willing to meet his family. But his family have turned it all upside down and fixed his rishta 'back home' against his will and the brother I wish to marry is refusing and saying this is not what i want. But his family are saying you either marry our choice or the door is there. basically he is being forced into this marriage, but we both really wish to marry each other, we both have the same understanding and make a good team. We do not want to cause rifts in the family but we do want to get married but due to that rishta being fixed if his family pull out it will bring shame onto the family, but this marriage to that girl isn't what he wants :/

Please can anyone give any Islamic advice in what we can do and what would be the right thing to do? :|
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Quote Nausheen Replybullet Posted: 03 December 2012 at 8:40pm
Walalikum assalam wa rahmatullah,

This guy should go ahead and tell the girl and her family that he is interested in another person. He should clearly explain to the other party that he is being forcibly dragged into this, despite his intentions.

If this does not change the situation, he should take the door.

Life is not a joke. Its not a loan from our parents either, we are not bond slaves of those who gave birth to us. If those who claim to love us and know us better do not relinquish control in matters like these one has to grow tall and take a strong stand.

A last thing that I would like to add is that parents under all circumstances deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. This can be very tough when one has to go against their wishes, nevertheless one has to see to it, and not compromise ones life at the same time

best of luck to both of you!
Wanu nazzilu minal Qurani ma huwa
Shafaa un wa rahmatun lil mo'mineena
wa la yaziduzzalimeena illa khasara.
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