Divorce

Caringheart,
Greetings to you!

It is interesting to note divorce is not even an option in christianity. Now I understand your stance in debate on this thread better.
Thank you for sharing the article.

The case in Islam is not so impossible. It is said in the Quran that divorce is one of the most disliked things to Allah for which He has granted permissibility.

Im really grateful to God that He is so merciful and that Islam subtly takes into regard the weaknesses of mankind.

Some questions: Did the Prophet wish to divorce Sawda bint Zam'a? Or did she just fear or think that he would? If yes, why would she think that he would?

Greetings Caringheart,

Greetings Nausheen,

Your post when reading #1... so crushing to my heart.
I know of these injustices of course.  Just I suppose, for those who do not live in a society where this is every day, the mind protects itself from believing how frequent and common they are.  I had a friend in India - a doctor in training - and I asked him what he found so distressing about being there... He is a very religious/spiritual young man.  He never would tell me.
What I do not understand is that if a contract has been made, then that contract should be satisfied before the marriage, and final after the marriage has taken place.  What needs to change are the laws that allow this sort of thing to happen.

What gets me about this is view of west is so terrible, why, when there are things like this going on in other parts of the world, which to me is so much worse than moral failings of the west.  I mean, yes, morals are way down in the west and this is very distressing, but this senseless killing - so little value of human life?  It is one thing when people's lack of morals, disobedience to God, hurts themselves, but when 'obedience' to God hurts others -  Which is the worse of the two evils?

In cases #2,3,4 of abuse, I agree, no one should live with abuse.  This is so sad for children when there is no solution.
Often what people have done in the past, since divorce is unallowable,  they quietly left their spouse and went somewhere else to live saying that the spouse had died.  Often children were even told this.  This does not break the law of God and allows one to have somewhat of a life, as long as they know that they are still held to their vow of marriage in God's eyes, and anything outside of God's law will be counted as sin against them, and they will be held accountable on judgement day.

These are  the reasons we are admonished not to yoke with unbelievers.  If both do not have God there is no marriage.  Something my mother shared with me:

Marriage Takes Three
 Marriage takes three to be complete;
It's not enough for two to meet.
They must be united in love
By love's Creator, God above.
Then their love will be firm and strong;
Able to last when things go wrong,
Because they've felt God's love and know
He's always there, He'll never go.
And they have both loved Him in kind
With all the heart and soul and mind
And in that love they've found the way
To love each other every day.
A marriage that follows God's plan
Takes more than a woman and a man.
Marriage takes three.
� Beth Stuckwisch/Dicksons

This is why at my wedding ceremony we lit three candles signifying the two becoming in union with God.

Case #5 is what I consider 'bearing the cross' that has been given by God.  Accepting that the marriage was formed and honoring that covenant even though it is imperfect.  It may change as time goes on.  This takes great courage, endurance, faith, obedience... all things that grow character.

What needs to change are the rules by which some of these marriages are created, maybe not so much the rules by which they are broken.  If marriages are made first by better rules, rules of God,  then rules for breaking marriage would not be needed. 
*Sigh 
If only it were a perfect world where all knew how to follow God.

I'm glad you liked the lyrics, now I share with you a poem.

Salaam,
Caringheart


Edited by Caringheart - 02 November 2012 at 5:09pm