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Message Icon Topic: I am very confused due to some personal issues... Post Reply Post New Topic
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Male Islam

Joined: 22 April 2010
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Quote umairabid Replybullet Topic: I am very confused due to some personal issues...
    Posted: 03 November 2010 at 12:35am
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Assalam u Alaikum, My name is Umair Abid I am a 20 years old guy and going to be of 21 in January 2011. Currently I am doing job as an SEO Analyst in Lahore and studying in the 2nd semester of BS(CS) hons. from Virtual University. When I was at the age of 17 I met a girl and At first glance I like her and pray to Allah that give her to me if it is possible I agree that I was not mature at that time but somehow I got the chance to talk with her and after two years I propose her and she accepted my proposal i was very happy and also set up my mind for the responsibilities that I have to full fill. I decided to inform our parents as soon as she gets admission in the university so that we can come close to each other in the way which Islam teaches us and we also don't want to unplease Allah. But when she inform her parents they gives lame excuses about myself and try to create the problem of status which was not that much and not so prominent they are like belong to higher middle class and I am from middle class and they also try to create misunderstandings between me and her and said that her daughter has broken their trust which she doesn't I know its wrong to talk with na mehram but we haven't discussed any adult topic or and didn't cross our limits but now it is becoming difficult for us to maintain limits we are together from 4 years and love each other and that's why we want to engaged our selves in the relation by doing nikah but her parents are creating difficulties for us because it is quite clear to them that we are not giving away each other without any proper reason and excuse and they know that their is nothing so much wrong with me. I am afraid that they may harm their daughter because they are so much status conscious as her father said to my parent that what only matters for him is his reputation in the society in terms of status. I know that after the marriage you are not being so emotional with your partner and the issues does raise and you have fights but as I have mentioned that we both have very good understanding with each other so this understanding will help us to overcome such issues I am aware from all the realities of the real life but I feel like complete with her because she exactly know how to deal with me and what sort of person I am. I was going to nikkah with her but than I come to know you can’t do it until you have the permission of the father of the girl and I don’t want to do anything wrong and out of limit as I am aware from the fact that I will also become father and I am also a brother of a sister.  

What should I do now suggest something for me in the light of Islam so that I can find peace.

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Quote seekshidayath Replybullet Posted: 04 December 2010 at 12:00pm
As Salamu Alaikum wa rahmatullah
Welcome to Islamicity.
Sorry for being late to respond. Is the situation same now ? If so --
I see that both of you are conscious of Islam. I wish if their's khayr with this relationship, Allah swt soon ease the path of you. Is it not possible for the girl to contact other close relatives who can please her father ?
What does her mother say ?
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: “All the descendants of Adam are sinners, and the best of sinners are those who repent."
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