The goal of Men

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   Assalamu Alaikum,
Arabian, first, I'm an American woman from the US and I don't find your attitude towards woman attractive at all.  Nor do I consider kindness as a weakness in men.  In fact, I find the Islamic attitude toward men, woman and their partnership to be most glorious.  I want to be married someday to a good, pious Islamic man...and no, not an arranged married.  I know that if he is pious, not only will he be kind to me, he will help me in my path to Allah (swt), he will provide for me and he will also help me achieve sexual satisfaction.  It is a misnomer to believe that because someone is Muslim that they will have a passionless marriage.  If both partners are pious, they will love one another and give each what they need in all areas of life.  This does not mean that all Muslim marriages achieve this, but that is not the fault of Islam.  Islam protects these things, it is cultures and traditions that get in the way and cause marriages to fall short of what Allah (swt) ordained for them.
Second, you said, "I truly believed she was sent to stop my wicked ways."  What you overlook is that there is only one that can do that for you, Allah (swt).  If you want to stop your wicked ways, and I do believe that your ways are wicked, then you must submit your will to Allah (swt).  Until you are able to do that, you will continue on that path.  And if you do, it is recorded in the Qur'an what you will get on the Day of Judgment.  I know that you like sex, but I fear the kind of sex you will get in hell won't be of your liking.
Third, I once heard a man say that a real man is one that can put all of his efforts into loving one woman.  He said that the easy way out was dating many because you never had to be serious or committed.  So, maybe your actions are a mere from of escapism.  You may say, �Well, then Islam doesn't allow for real men because it allows for more than one wife.�  But even in Islam when a man takes more than one wife, he is obligated to provide for all of their needs and to do so justly.  Taking another wife doesn�t allow him to sidestep any of his Islamic responsibilities.   In fact, only a few Muslim men are truly able to fulfill the requirements of having more than one wife.  Note, Allah (swt) give men this right in order to provide for society in times of crisis, not to simply use women in the same way a dog would use a bitch (i.e., a female dog).
Forth, it is unjust for you to bring up the issue of mu'ta marriages and attribute that kind of behavior to Islam.  Even if mu'ta marriages were legal at one time in Islamic history the situation in which it was approved was not simply so that Muslimic men could "play the field."  It was a situation of war when men were many months away from their families.  It was sanctioned as a means to keep them from committing adultery and from treating the female captives in harmful ways.  I don't know of any time in Islamic history that mu'ta marriages were sanctioned other than for that purpose.  And, once the days of heavy battle were over, mu'ta marriages were made illegal.  Just because there is a group of Muslims that still carry out this practice does not mean that it is lawful or that it is currently an Islamic right.
Fifth, you attitude and behaviors toward women is exactly why Allah (swt) gave us hijabb�Allahu Akbar.
PAZ (peace) 

Edited by Khadija1021